


Friends With Renefits

by MoonwalkingCrab



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Domestic Fluff, Dream Kisses, First Kiss, Fluff, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Hand Jobs, Hurt/Comfort, Hux's Dad is an Arsehole, Jealousy, Love Confessions, M/M, Massage, Masturbation, Mutual Pining, Pining, Rimming, Semi-Public Sex, Shower Sex, Sickness, Slow Burn, Snoke Ships It, Spite Blowjobs, these boys are idiots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-13
Updated: 2017-02-14
Packaged: 2018-09-17 03:54:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 37,439
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9303017
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MoonwalkingCrab/pseuds/MoonwalkingCrab
Summary: The Rules:1. Just sex, no feelings2. The arrangement lasts as long as is beneficial3. Either party can choose to end the arrangement, no questions asked4. No kissing





	1. February

**Author's Note:**

> I'm both very sorry and totally not sorry for the title of this story.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cover art for this fic is [here](http://moonwalkingcrab.tumblr.com/image/157236132124/)!
> 
> Drawn by the wonderful [Pudding](http://the-pudding-is-a-lie.tumblr.com/)!

Cold droplets trickled their way down Hux’s neck as he climbed the stairs to his apartment. The grey February rain had been threatening to spill all day and evidently his leaving work had been the final catalyst. Breathing deep Hux unlocked the door to his apartment. Of course he had been the only one working late, it was Valentine’s day and a small part of him was convinced he was the only person in the city without a date.

Shaking the raindrops from his hair Hux slipped from the warmth of his jacket and into the cold emptiness of his home. The light was dim as he slid off his shoes and circled his shoulders, spine crackling. Hux stretched out, head tipping back to stare at the blank whiteness of the ceiling. His skin prickled with goosebumps and Hux sighed to himself. There really wasn’t much for him to do on such a miserable night. He would shower, eat, then sleep. It wasn’t worth even trying to watch television, he’d only be bombarded with grossly cheerful _romantic_ movies and he was not in the mood.

It was bad enough that he’d probably be subjected to tales of Ren’s exploits the instant he saw him at the office tomorrow. The man was freelance, only appearing at the advertising agency when he felt like it, or so it seemed. Yet somehow he still managed to win the approval of Company Director Snoke and insinuate himself as a particular thorn in Hux’s side. It had been months of thinly veiled insults and snide comments before the disaster that was the Starkiller campaign had them actually talking to one another. Conciliatory drinks had somehow turned into an odd sort of friendship and now it seemed Hux couldn’t go a day without running into the younger man.

Hux stepped into the warmth of the shower with a long sigh, he might as well relax tonight. He was certain he’d have to put up with Ren bragging about his date the next day. Hux had mentioned so many times that he wasn’t interested in hearing about Ren’s love life but still he persisted, always trying to get under Hux’s skin. It didn’t help that Hux himself was going through something of a dry spell and Ren’s unnecessarily _detailed_ stories did nothing to help.

Running his soapy hands down his body Hux felt a shiver run through him. He wondered idly how his own night would have gone had he bought into the ridiculous commercialisation that was Valentine’s and gotten himself a date.

Maybe he wouldn’t be showering alone for a start.

Humming to himself Hux’s mind conjured up the image of broad hands circling down his hips and a hard body pressed against his own. Hux’s fingers stroked down the length of his torso, mimicking the man in his fantasy, slowly starting to harden in the close, steamy air. He closed his hand about his cock in a loose grip, slowly stroking the length in lazy, wet slides. Hux imagined himself arching into the man’s rough touch, his fingers trailing up to circle one nipple. His breath hissed out, only adding to the warmth in the enclosed shower as he pictured plush lips descending on his neck, licking down the length of his throat, following the trail of the water. He slid his other hand downwards, rolling his balls in one hand, groping at them the way he imagined his nonexistent date might.

As he leaned his head back under the stream of water, mouth opening in a moan Hux jolted. There was a rattle of keys and the sound of his own door slamming before heavy footsteps paced into the apartment.

 _You have to be kidding me_.

Hux felt his erection wilt in his hand, unable to return to the faceless man of his fantasies when his apartment was being invaded. He rinsed the last of the soap from his hair and grabbed for his robe, voice shrill in irritation.

“Why the fuck are you in my house Ren?! How many times do I have to tell you?!”

Kylo stretched out on the couch, loosening his tie, amusement bubbling in his chest as Hux stormed into the living room, dripping wet and looking entirely unthreatening in his green bathrobe.

“Date didn’t work out,” he said with a shrug, “and I’m not going back to my place, Poe’s cooking dinner for his boyfriend and I wasn’t about to crash their evening.”

“So you thought you’d come disturb me instead?” Hux’s tone was acerbic, his face flushed. “I was in the bloody _shower_! You couldn’t have knocked?” 

Kylo could feel the smile spreading across his face; getting Hux riled up was always so easy, and yet in the office he was calm and collected, almost emotionless. Even when the Starkiller failure had threatened to collapse the company Hux had remained stoic. It was amazing to see the transformation that a little light teasing could bring.

Hux’s hands were balled into fists at his sides and frustration radiated from every line of his body. His cheeks glowed, the blush spreading down his neck and underneath the fluffy robe. Kylo blinked, this was unusual, in general it was Hux’s ears that turned scarlet with rage, in fact if it weren’t for the scowl on his face he would have said that Hux looked almost _aroused_.

Suddenly it clicked and Kylo’s mouth fell open, “Oh! You were getting yourself off in there, weren’t you?” He jerked his thumb in the direction of the door “I can go away and come back in five minutes if you want to finish up.”

“Five min- I just- I don’t- What does it matter what I was doing? _Why are you here_!?” Hux’s face was almost puce now and Kylo felt a faint stir of guilt. Hux was pacing, voice raising, “Oh no, of course Hux will be home. It’s not like he has any plans!” He collapsed onto the couch in a slump and Kylo shifted, biting at his lip.

“I just needed a place to crash and I thought you might like the company.” Kylo nudged Hux with his elbow, “Don’t you want to hear about my terrible date?”

Hux gave a wan smile, “Well… maybe.” He leaned back into the cushions, “It might make me feel better.”

“Okay, picture the scene. I’m sitting there looking like,” Ren gestured down his body, “well, this.” He smirked and Hux rolled his eyes. “And I’m meeting this guy Brian from the gym, we’ve talked a bit and he seemed nice,” he shook his head, a crease forming between his eyebrows, “Oh god was I wrong. The guy shows up almost a half hour late, which I’d maybe have overlooked if he hadn’t been drunk off his ass.”

Hux blinked, “Seriously?”

“Oh yeah, you could smell it. So I thought ‘hey, maybe he’s just nervous’. You know, still trying to look on the bright side, and that was fine, he seemed to relax a bit.” Kylo shifted to face Hux, eyes growing wider as he continued, “We got to talking and I think I mentioned something about an ex-girlfriend and the guy goes _silent_.”

Raising an eyebrow in confusion Hux tilted his head, waiting for Ren to keep talking. He was visibly agitated now, hands gesturing wildly as he spoke.

“And Brian, he turns and says to me ‘Good thing you got over that phase and realised you were gay then, it’d be such a waste otherwise’. Honestly Hux, you should have seen the look on his face, I almost hit him right there.” Hux just nodded as Ren’s voice started to rise. 

“I explained that _no_ , I’m not ‘over that phase’, I’m thirty fucking years old and I know exactly who I am. I’m a bisexual guy who is rapidly tiring of this date. And you know what he says to me? ‘I bet you voted for Organa’.” 

Ren’s fingers gripped into the soft couch cushions, “So that’s when I told him the date was over, nevermind that he’d already downed another two drinks before we’d even ordered.”

“Rightly so.” Hux said, “No wonder you came over.”

“Oh I’m not finished! He tried to follow me out. Told me I was ‘making a scene’. He actually tried to grab me by the arm,” Ren shrugged, “Of course by that point he was so drunk that he missed completely and fell face first into the lobster tank. I didn’t stay to help. The last thing I heard was him shouting that a lobster had him by the thumb and someone else calling for the manager.”

Amusement rippled up through Hux’s body and he gave a short laugh. “Maybe it’s for the best that I didn’t have a date tonight.”

Kylo shrugged, relieved to see some of the tension drained from Hux’s body, “Wanna order Chinese or something? My treat.”

“I should hope so, considering you broke in here.”

“I didn’t break in, I’ve got a key!” Kylo protested, conveniently leaving out the fact that Hux hadn’t actually given him the key. He’d just forgotten to give it back after the last time Hux had been on vacation and asked him to collect his mail.

Hux just sniffed, looking down his nose at him. “I’ll get the spare blanket out if you’re planning on staying here then.” 

Kylo nodded, “Sure, if you don’t mind.”

“As if I could stop you anyway.”

They ate in companionable silence, picking holes on one of the inane rom-coms that plagued almost every tv station and before Hux knew it he was half asleep, yawning into a throw pillow. Ren had already stretched out, taking up far too much of the couch, large as it was. He was wrapped cocoon-like in Hux’s blanket in just his underwear, eyes drooping, most of his fancy suit now scattered across the floor.

Hux shifted awkwardly, trying not to disturb Ren too much as he switched off the tv, robe sliding up to expose his thigh when he tried to maneuver around Ren’s bulk. The pale glare of his skin stood out in the dim light and Hux gasped when he heard Ren’s voice rumble out of the dark. The tone was lower than usual and silky smooth, the type of voice that melted Hux from the inside out.

“You know I could always come to bed with you. Finish what you started earlier.” 

Warmth spread through Hux as a large hand brushed up his leg, setting his skin aflame. Ren’s eyes were just visible, faintly glimmering in the reflected light of the city outside.

“What are you saying Ren?” His voice was low, barely a whisper. 

“I could make you feel good Hux. Release a little tension. God knows you need it,” Ren said, “We could help each other out, nothing serious.”

Hux pulled back from the touch, heart hammering so hard he could feel it in his mouth, he turned for his room, stumbling a little, only to stop and glance back. Ren was leaning on one arm, the blanket falling to expose broad shoulders peppered with moles. His eyes glimmered almost dangerously in the dark, his hair cascading down like a halo made of shadow. Hux’s mouth was open before he realised it, words spilling out.

“I’ll think about it.”


	2. March

Ren’s offer pervaded Hux’s thoughts for the next few weeks. He would be in his office working away when the memory would hit him, Ren’s voice, the pressure of his hand, the warmth of his skin. He found himself watching Ren as he worked, hovering outside the door of his office, trying not to make it seem too obvious.

He couldn’t deny that Ren was an extremely attractive man, and loathe as he was to admit it, it really had been a while since he’d felt the touch of another person, he was starting to forget what it felt like. And maybe Ren had a point. Hux was almost always tense, the only real stress relief he had was his morning run. It would be a welcome relief to let go, to stop thinking for a while and just lose himself in someone else. If Ren’s stories were anything to go by then he would probably be in for a pretty good time.

It was settled then, the next time Ren stopped by Hux would tell him. As long as there were no strings attached then it could work out quite well. He didn’t have time for a relationship and if they were hanging out anyway then they might as well enjoy themselves. Hux found himself wondering why he hadn’t thought of it before. He supposed he just wasn’t used to thinking of Ren in that manner. Watching the way he bent over his desk, shirt tightening across broad shoulders, Hux felt a stirring in his stomach. He definitely _could_ get used to it though.

Kylo could feel Hux’s eyes burning into him from the other side of the room and smirked to himself. He really thought he was being sneaky, it was almost endearing. He had the feeling that Hux was still mulling over his offer of a little sexual release, at least if his increasing distraction in meetings was any indication. It couldn’t be more obvious, especially due to the fact that Hux always surfaced from his daydreams with his eyes firmly on Kylo’s crotch.

Kylo was feeling generous, he’d make it easy for Hux by turning up at his apartment that night. He was almost certain that Hux would agree, which was all the better for him. It had been a few months since he’d last had the company of someone other than his own right hand, despite what he may have told Hux to the contrary. Truth be told he had nursed something of a small crush on the man when they’d first started working together and it was quite nice to think that they might get the chance to at least have a little bit of fun together.

Generally Kylo wasn’t the relationship type, he’d had a few girlfriends and boyfriends but nothing serious. He’d never found someone that he wanted to spend all of his time with, everything just got too serious after a while, he was glad that Hux seemed to feel the same way. It would definitely make things easier.

He stretched up from his desk, one hand pulling the tie from his hair, letting it spill from it’s messy bun to run his fingers through it. There was a loud slam and Kylo looked around to see the door to Hux’s office now firmly shut. Mirth bubbled up in his chest and he let out a small laugh.

Oh yes, this was definitely going to be fun.

Kylo turned up at Hux’s apartment that night fresh from the gym. His wet hair twisted in loose curls and his body thrummed with energy. His stomach however, was in knots. There was always a chance that things could go terribly wrong and he would lose the only real friend he had, he couldn’t bear the thought of that. Kylo shook his head. No, no use thinking the worst. Things wouldn’t change much, they’d still hang out, just occasionally they’d fuck too.

To his surprise he found Hux’s apartment unlocked, the smell of something cooking wafting down the hallway. Kylo’s mouth watered and he wandered into the kitchen to see Hux bent over the oven stirring some sort of stew.

“Come in then.” Hux smirked, seeing the startled jerk Ren gave reflected in the chrome of the oven. “I thought you’d be here tonight.” He could feel his cheeks colouring but was determined not to back down, “I suppose I _was_ rather obvious.”

Ren just grinned at him with that obnoxious lopsided smile, “Well, yeah, you’ve been staring at my dick for days. I’m guessing you’re gonna take me up on my offer then?”

“Yes, why not? We’re both grown men. We can have sex without things getting weird. And you’re not exactly bad to look at either.” Hux hoped the wave of awkwardness washing over him wasn’t obvious in his voice.

Ren just laughed, “Thanks... I think.”

“Did you want to eat?” Hux spooned some stew into a bowl, offering it across the countertop, “Then we can, I dunno, play Diablo or something.”

Kylo blinked in surprise, “You don’t wanna, y’know, _get started_?” He winced a little, embarrassment starting to coil in the pit of his stomach..

 _Oh god I sound too eager, don’t I?_

Hux’s cheeks glowed pink but he kept his face nonchalant, “Well that would be nice, but I don’t have condoms and I figured you’d want to be safe.”

“Oh. Well yeah.” Kylo shrugged, feeling the colour start to rise on his own cheeks, “Although I got tested just before Valentine’s Day and I’ve not been with anyone since then, I’m good to go.” He tapped his fork on the countertop, watching Hux from beneath the curtain of his hair, this was worse than contract negotiations with Snoke. “What about you?”

Hux poured out some wine for them both and took a sip before he answered. “My last test was three months ago, and it’s been six since I last slept with anyone, I’m clean.”

Kylo felt his eyebrows raise, _six months_? He looked Hux up and down, surprised. Hux was exactly his kind of guy, tall and slim with pouty lips and cheekbones that could cut glass, he found his mind wandering, wondering if his hair was the same colour all over.

“Oh cool. So we can… um… whenever.” 

“Yes, I suppose we can.” Hux focused on his food, not sure what else to say. Heat was rising in his body and clouding his mind. What did he and Ren usually talk about? He couldn’t quite remember. The air in the apartment seemed suddenly pressurised, closing in on him and making him shift in his own skin. He looked across the countertop to where Ren was practically inhaling his food, one large finger swiping sauce from the bowl, only to be sucked between full pink lips. 

Hux swallowed. His mouth was suddenly dry and the wine did nothing to quench his thirst. He could barely taste his food and finally pushed the bowl away with a loud clatter, if only to break the fog of tension that had descended.

“Well, I’m going to set up the game, feel free to have some more if you want.” Hux practically ran to the living room, methodically going through the motions of setting up the console. He glared at the screen, trying to calm himself. He was overthinking things.

Ren soon flopped down next to him with his usual gracelessness and grabbed a controller. He didn’t speak, which Hux was thankful for, and slowly, surely, the atmosphere returned to normal. Hux was just starting to relax when he felt a soft pressure on his thigh.

Ren’s voice was tentative, even as his hand stroked in firm circles, “So Hux, would it be okay if I sucked your dick? I’ve kinda been thinking about it. Six months is far too long to go without.”

Nodding mutely Hux leaned back into the couch, eyes slipping closed as he exhaled. He fumbled for the button on his jeans and felt broad palms gently slide them out of the way. “Just relax, I’ve been told I’m pretty good at this.” Ren dropped to his knees, hands kneading at Hux’s thighs, spreading warmth through the lower half of Hux’s body.

Focusing purely on the sensations; rough hands pushing at the hem of his shirt, hot breath warming him even through the thick denim, Hux felt his breath catch. Anticipation sent shivers down his body as Ren’s deliciously warm mouth pressed kisses across his stomach, large nose nuzzling into the trail of red hair that led downwards. He was starting to harden and let out a soft huff of breath when one big palm pressed against the zipper, smoothing along the outline of his cock.

Kylo’s lips followed his hand, kissing through the fabric before reaching to undo Hux’s trousers, revealing black boxers and a rapidly growing erection. To his joy he found the hair leading down from Hux’s navel to be just a shade darker than that on his head. He licked his lips, already thinking of the weight of Hux’s cock on his tongue, the taste of skin, and the noises that Hux might make once he took it in his mouth. Hux was still visibly tense, head tipped back and eyes shut and Kylo ran his hands up pale thighs to grip gently on narrow hips, “You can grab my hair if you want,” he said pressing a series of small open mouthed kisses up the inside of one creamy thigh, “pull it even. I like that.” His own arousal was already starting to stir but it was an afterthought for now.

Nuzzling into the juncture of Hux’s thighs Kylo breathed deep, inhaling the scent of fresh cotton and soap, as well as the heady musk of arousal, already growing stronger. Hux’s cock was against his cheek, hot beneath the thin barrier of his underwear and Kylo reached to take it in one hand, smoothing up the length, dragging the cotton of Hux’s boxers over it in a couple of loose strokes. Hux let out a sigh and pushed his jeans lower, he glanced at Kylo and a small wrinkle appeared between his brows. Kylo just caught the hint of a pink tongue wetting Hux’s lips before the jeans were taken off completely and Hux’s knees came to rest either side of his head.

Hux’s hair was starting to fall out of it’s usual perfection and the rosy tint on his cheeks only increased as Kylo mouthed at his cock. Kylo felt an odd flutter of excitement, wondering just how many people had seen this side of Hux. A small part of him hoped it wasn’t many.

A small thrill ran through Hux when he felt Ren’s hands slide under the waistband of his underwear, skilled fingers wrapping around the length of him. What he wasn’t expecting though was the look of surprise when Ren drew his cock out.

“Oh,” he breathed, “I didn’t realise you were…”

“What?” Hux hissed in a breath as Kylo slipped his fingers down, drawing the foreskin back from the head of his cock, eyes wide. “Uncut? Circumcision isn’t really common in the UK. You don’t, um… you don’t have a problem with it, do you?” Ren’s fingers still stroked at him, eyes focused on watching his foreskin slide up and down. Some of the men Hux had been with in the past had been a little put off but Ren seemed more fascinated than anything. His voice was rougher when he spoke.

“No it’s cool, I’ve just never seen-” Hux watched Ren’s throat bob as he swallowed, “I can’t imagine there’s too big a difference.”

“Not really, but the head is a little more sensiti-mmnph!” Hux’s back arched as Ren descended without warning, suddenly engulfing him in hot, wet, heat. His hands almost instinctually tangled in thick hair, gripping tight, grounding himself. Toes curled, he sank back into the couch, letting the sensations wash over him.

Kylo’s eyes slipped shut as he swallowed Hux down, hollowing his cheeks. His tongue lapped in circles around the head of Hux’s cock, savouring the little gasps that fell from his lips. His scalp tingled where fingers were gripped tight in his hair, each minute tug sending jolts straight through him. Kylo hummed in satisfaction, relishing the taste, flicking his tongue across Hux’s slit to catch each new drop of precome.

Hux bucked his hips, desperate to feel more. He could already feel himself on edge, the combination of six months of loneliness and the skill of Ren’s mouth almost too much to handle. Large hands rubbed circles on his thighs and he couldn’t help but look down, mouth falling open at the sight. Ren’s eyes were squeezed shut, his mouth wide and pink slipping over Hux’s cock. The loose waves of his hair bounced with every bob of his head which only made Hux grip tighter. He could feel the muscles of Ren’s throat working at him every time he swallowed, each bob of his Adam’s apple drawing a moan from Hux’s mouth.

Kylo pulled back, dragging the flat of his tongue along the underside of Hux’s cock. His lips pushed the soft foreskin back, dipping and tasting, his tongue swirling around the head, one hand working the shaft. “Ren!” Hux gasped, “Ren I’m close!”

Kylo just smiled, pulling back to run his lips across the head once more, tongue flicking at the frenulum. Hux swore, convulsing beneath Kylo’s hand, the movement jolting his cock from Kylo’s mouth. Kylo spluttered, feeling a warm splash across his face, another landing in his hair. He wiped his face with one hand, dragging his tongue across the palm to taste. Hux’s eyes went wide even as his cock twitched out a final spurt, “Oh god, I’m so sorry!”

Kylo just growled, lapping the come that dribbled down Hux’s cock before pulling himself up to straddle one pale thigh, “Don’t be, that was hot.” He bucked his hips, grinding against one bare leg, the fabric of his workout pants only serving to increase the friction. Hux panted up at him, unable to drag his eyes away. His hands found Kylo’s hips, guiding his movements, one hand sliding around to grab at his ass.

“Tell me what you want, Ren.” Hux bit his lip at Kylo’s come spattered face, his dark eyes blown almost black with lust, “Do you want me to kiss you?”

For the first time Ren faltered and he looked away, “No. Just- just touch me.” Hux nodded, sliding his hand into Ren’s sweatpants. He squeezed at the hard length, feeling it twitch in his hand. It was an odd angle and thicker than his own but Hux set the same quick pace he used whenever he desperately needed to get off and felt Ren arch into his touch with a low moan. “Oh god yes, just like that.”

It didn’t take long before Kylo had slumped forwards, moaning in hot breaths into the juncture of Hux’s neck. His lips found Hux’s skin, nipping and sucking, desperately trying to muffle the sounds he was making. His hips stuttered, cock pulsing in Hux’s fist as he came with a groan, fingers gripped tight enough to leave bruises on Hux’s shoulders. Panting he pushed himself upright just in time to catch Hux running his tongue across his knuckles, tasting him.

He rolled to the side, suddenly conscious of Hux’s half naked state and the come still cooling in his own hair. Hux’s face was pink, eyes cast downwards, his breathing just starting to steady.

“Well Ren, that was… um… yeah.” He inclined his head, shuffling his underwear back up and nodded, “We should do that again sometime.” He rubbed a hand at the growing bloom on his neck, “Maybe, don’t bite me next time though? Or at least do it somewhere less visible.”

“Noted,” said Kylo stretching himself out, “I should probably get home, I’m gonna need to shower again.” He’d managed to wipe his hair off a little but the strands still stuck together.

Hux flushed, “Ah, yes, sorry again about that.”

Kylo reached a hand to squeeze on one pale thigh, “Don’t be, I take it as a compliment.”

“Well alright then.” Hux shifted uncomfortably, “So how does this work? Do we set aside a night or something?”

Kylo snorted, “You _would_ be the type to schedule sex. Nah, just take it easy, you really need to get off, give me a call and we’ll sort something out. I mean, I don't wanna be tied down to any kind of schedule, that's bit weird.” Kylo shrugged, rising to his feet, “We see each other a couple of times a week anyway. Just maybe one of those times instead of playing Xbox you play with my ass instead?”

Hux nodded, kicking his jeans aside to walk Ren to the door. He supposed he couldn’t be embarrassed around someone when he’d already come in their face. “I’ll see you in the office then?” They paused at the door, and Hux could swear he felt something hanging in the air between them, he quirked a smile in an attempt to defuse the unexpected tension. “I feel like I should kiss you goodnight or something.”

Kylo turned, expression unreadable, “No, you don’t need to do anything like that.” He pulled the door open, meeting Hux’s eyes, just for a moment. “It’s a bit intimate." Hux just caught his last words before the door shut behind him. 

"This isn’t that kind of arrangement.”


	3. April

Whatever the arrangement was it was definitely working for Hux, after a few weeks of semi-regular handjobs and blowjobs he was more relaxed than he had been in a long while. He was more productive at work and the entire agency seemed to have noticed. Ren too seemed in a better mood than usual, he still skulked about the office on occasion but now whenever his temper flared Hux knew exactly how to handle it.

On this day Ren had gotten into a particularly volatile argument with one of Hux’s underlings and after ensuring that Mitaka was alright and sending him home for the rest of the day Hux invited Ren to his office. He and Ren were the same level of seniority so he couldn’t exactly order him to stop taking his frustrations out on other people, he could however offer a different outlet.

“What exactly is bothering you Ren? I haven’t seen you this angry since the Starkiller project fell through.”

“Family stuff, don’t ask me to tell you any more.” Ren’s jaw was stubbornly set causing Hux to roll his eyes, arms folded against his chest.

“I wasn’t going to ask.” Hux’s eyes softened as he looked Ren over, “I know you have problems with them.” Reaching out he brushed a hand up one thigh, “Can I help you feel better? I don’t have any meetings this afternoon.”

Kylo grunted, rubbing the tension from his neck with one hand, “I dunno, somehow I don’t think a quick office blowjob is going to help.” His words dripped with sarcasm.

“Hmm…” Hux leaned back in his chair, eyes flicking up to Kylo’s face, “Well why not come over tonight? I might not look it but I do give pretty good massages. It might not solve any problems but it could make you feel better. You’ve been a big help to me, it’s only fair I return the favour.”

Kylo just grumbled, he doubted that something as simple as a massage would be enough to take his mind off things. Although it was nice that Hux was trying to help. A flicker of warmth bloomed in his stomach for a moment before being washed away by the familiar rising anger. “Fine. Just tell your minions to keep out of my way.”

Hux’s eyebrows arched, “I’m sure they’re smart enough to do that already,” he smiled, “you don’t scare me though.”

Kylo just shook his hair from his eyes and turned to leave, hopefully he’d feel better by the time the work day was done.

Of course, inevitably, the instant they stepped off the subway the light April shower turned into more of a deluge. They crowded as best they could under the shelter of Hux’s umbrella, shoulders bumping as they walked. A chill wind slapped at their faces, turning the raindrops into a stinging hail that numbed every inch of skin it hit. Hux shivered and tried to shield himself behind the larger bulk of Ren which served only to jostle their elbows once more. They were still a few streets away when a particularly strong gust turned the umbrella inside out, ripping it from Hux’s hand to send it spiralling into the air and out of sight.

Swearing, Hux turned to Kylo, expecting to see the same anger and frustration as earlier, eyebrows raising in surprise when he found a small half smile and warmth in Ren’s eyes. He shook his head, drops flying from his already drenched hair, “This is ridiculous. Let’s just get back to your place.” Hux nodded, setting a brisker pace and hoping that the rain wouldn’t ruin his suit.

They were both shivering by the time Hux pushed the door to his apartment open, shedding their outer coats in an unceremonious pile near the door. Hux slipped his shoes off and headed for the linen closet, piling towels into his arms and turning up the heat in the apartment. Padding back to Ren he threw a towel in his direction, watching as Ren simply draped it over his head like a veil.

“We should get out these wet clothes,” Hux said, noticing that Ren had thought to hang up their coats and feeling a faint brush of affection. Dark eyes peered out from beneath the white cotton and Hux stepped forward to slip his fingers between the buttons of Ren’s shirt, already admiring the way the wet fabric clung to the planes of his chest, outlining impressive pectorals and the faintest hint of nipples pebbled with cold.

Despite himself Kylo could feel a thrill of nerves run through him, he and Hux had been helping each other out for over a month now but this was the first time they’d come close to actually getting undressed. Hux crooked his finger, leading him towards the bedroom, more new territory. 

So far everything they had done had been on Hux’s couch, quick blowjobs and lazily jerking each other off in front of the television. Kylo had been content enough with that but if Hux was in the mood to go a little further then he wasn’t about to stop him.

Ren’s skin was cold beneath the damp clothes and Hux wasted no time in stripping them from the toned body, palms rubbing circles in an attempt to bring some warmth to the taller man. His eyes roved up and down, taking everything in, the trail of dark hair he was already familiar with, a few small scars and too many moles to count. The low burn of his arousal was somewhat quashed by the damp clothes clinging uncomfortably to his skin. “Lie down Ren, I’ll just get out of these wet things and then I’ll get the oil.”

Kylo pulled the towel from his hair, rubbing rough circles on his arms to rid himself of any residual moisture before slinging it around his waist. He stretched across Hux’s bed, head tilted in interest as the clinging fabric was peeled away from Hux’s pale skin. He really was thinner than he looked under all the layers and perfectly tailored suits, almost delicate in a way. But when his hands found Kylo’s shoulders, spreading oil with his palms and pressing hard into tense muscles, there was only strength.

His voice was warm in Kylo’s ear, “Lie down, let me do this properly.”

Hux bit his lip as he smoothed his hands over the broad expanse of back in slow circles, trying to bring a little warmth into the chill skin. Tiny clusters of moles appeared and disappeared beneath his palms and all Hux could think of was mapping them with his tongue. He pushed the thought aside, this wasn’t about sex, he was making Ren feel better. 

If Ren decided that fucking Hux into the mattress would also make him feel better then Hux would most definitely go along with it. For now though, he would focus on the back rub.

Beneath him Ren sighed, a long, slow exhale of pleasure that sent jolts through Hux. He hadn’t bothered putting on anything more than boxers and now he was starting to regret it. The feel of Ren’s skin, the scent of the oil, and the breathy little noises only served to make his cock twitch, steadily hardening. He kneeled on the bed next to Ren’s body, trying to focus and keep his hands where they were supposed to be, instead of reaching under the towel to squeeze at what he now knew to be a particularly pert, well muscled ass.

Working at the knots in Ren’s shoulders Hux leaned in, “How does that feel?” he asked, hoping his arousal didn’t show in his voice.

“Really good Hux, you’re better at this than I thought.”

“Hmm… I thought experience would have shown you how good I am with my hands.” Hux raised an eyebrow and smirked as Ren arched into his touch, holding his hip down with one hand. He trailed fingers up the ridges of Ren’s spine and smiled when he heard a sigh.

“You’re right, this does help. Thanks.”

“Just another benefit of being friends with me,” Hux’s hands alternated in pressure, kneading the tension from Kylo’s spine. He pressed his face to the soft sheets and breathed deep. His head was filled with the scent of fresh laundry, expensive aftershave and the unmistakeable, almost piney smell of Hux’s skin, something he was becoming increasingly familiar with.

Letting his breath out in a deep sigh Kylo mumbled into the sheets, “My father has disappeared again.”

Hux’s hands stilled, only for a moment, before continuing in sweeps across his shoulders, “I see.”

“He does it every so often, just disappears. He never did like staying in one place for too long.” Kylo bit his lower lip, unable to stop now that he’d started. “My mom is strong but I can tell how much it hurts her. Especially after I left home.” Fingers squeezed gently at his shoulders in reassurance, Hux’s hands stilling as he spoke. “I thought if I wasn’t around to argue with him then he might stick around with her. I guess I was wrong.”

Hux didn’t speak, for which Kylo was glad, he simply smoothed more oil onto Kylo’s skin, his movements gentler now, more of a caress, soft and soothing. The warmth of his palms spread through Kylo’s body, igniting something in the pit of his stomach. The lethargy that had plagued him all day was gone, replaced by a low burning fire that was already rising in intensity. Kylo propped himself up on his elbows, twisting to look at Hux.

“Hey. Thanks.” 

Ren’s voice thrummed through Hux’s fingertips and he felt a clench as guilt welled up in his chest. Ren had decided to open up to him and here he was, hard and throbbing, hoping the bulge in his underwear didn’t accidentally brush against the bare skin. He really was a terrible friend.

“Not a problem. So, um…” Hux stopped his ministrations. “Do you feel like getting food or something?”

“Actually, there’s just one other thing you could help me out with,” Kylo breathed rolling onto his back and pulling the towel from his waist. His erection bobbed against his stomach, already flushed and pink. Hux raised an eyebrow and smiled in relief. He slipped his underwear down with a wiggle of his hips, opened the bedside drawer and tossed a bottle in Kylo’s direction. “What are you-?” Kylo started, eyes widening as Hux crawled onto the bed on all fours, his hair falling across his forehead, still damp from the rain.

“Well, we’re on my bed,” Hux’s voice was husky, his skin almost translucent next to Kylo’s own, “we might as well make the best of it.”

“You want to…” Kylo sat upright, eyes tracing across Hux’s back, down the ridges of his spine, to the tiny freckled handful of his ass.

“Yes Ren,” green eyes rolled and a tinge of exasperation coloured Hux’s voice, “I want you to fuck me. Condoms are in the drawer.”

Kylo just sat, rolling the bottle between his hands, drinking in the sight and wondering why he hadn’t thought to get Hux naked sooner.

“Today would be nice.” Hux’s sarcasm level was rising and Kylo snapped into action by grabbing a condom, pouring the lube into his palms and rolling to press open-mouthed kisses down Hux’s spine. He dipped two fingers down the crease of Hux’s ass, swiping across his hole and reaching lower to trail the slick across his balls and along the long length of his cock. Hux hissed in through his teeth at the first touch, rocking backwards into Kylo’s hand.

Spreading his palm across one pert cheek Kylo gave a tentative squeeze. Nerves bloomed unexpectedly and he hesitated, it was surprising just how much he wanted this. Sliding his fingers up again he circled the pink pucker of Hux’s hole, watching in fascination as he stroked inwards. Hux practically melted under his touch, his body opening up willingly. His finger slipped easily past the first ring of muscle and Hux let out a low moan. 

“Mmm yes, just like that.”

Ren worked slowly, spreading and probing, setting a low burn in the pit of Hux’s stomach. His thick fingers were surprisingly delicate and Hux found himself moving his hips, rocking backwards in an attempt to get more. He needed it; more friction, more pressure, anything that Ren would give him. Still he went teasingly slow, holding Hux’s hip with one hand to prevent the errant jerks of his hips. Irritation curled up Hux’s spine, beating out the sensation of Ren’s fingers.

“Goddammit Ren I am not a fucking virgin, just hurry the fuck up and fuck me!” Hux snapped, “You’ve got a very nice cock there and I want you to use it!”

“Jesus, you’re bossy when you’re horny,” Kylo slid the condom on, slicking his cock with one hand and dragging it across Hux’s hole, making him hiss out in impatience. He smirked to himself, circling the tight furl with the head of his cock, pushing forward to breach Hux’s body and pulling out just as quickly.

“Don’t think I don’t know what you’re doing.” Hux’s voice was tight and breathless, “Such a teas- ah!” His words were cut off as Kylo pushed in once more, slowly sinking into the tight heat. His hands smoothed down Hux’s sides, fingers tickling past his ribs to wrap around narrow hips. 

Wiggling a little, Hux pushed back until Ren was seated fully. He relished the feeling of being filled, the stretch, the slight burn, the delicious pressure at the base of his spine. “Mmm good.” He rocked backwards, angling himself so that every movement of Ren’s cock sent sparks up his spine, “Whenever you want to start moving is good.”

Kylo breathed deep, leaning forward, forehead meeting the space between Hux’s shoulderblades, the skin there just starting to bead with sweat. He moved slowly, pulling out almost completely before sliding back in, mouth falling open at the little “Ah!” that was pulled from Hux’s mouth. He thrust in long, slow glides, determined to hear more of those sweet noises. Pleasure burned low in the pit of his stomach, spiking with every slap of skin and low moan that fell from Hux’s lips.

His hands found Hux’s hips, pulling him impossibly closer, the pace of his thrusts starting to increase as Hux clenched and moaned around him. 

“Ngh, yes, just like that!” 

Dropping one hand to curl about Hux’s cock Kylo bit his lip, focusing on wringing as much noise as possible from Hux. He was usually so reserved and this was a welcome change of pace. Even when he’d been on the brink of orgasm in the past he’d barely made a sound. Now though, with Kylo steadily fucking into him he seemed to have found his voice.

“Ah! Kylo, please!”

Something about the way Hux said his name made Kylo’s stomach clench and he drove his hips forward, arousal surging. He stroked at Hux’s cock in rough time with his own thrusts, thinking of nothing more than making Hux call him by his first name again. His own pleasure was forgotten, every movement he made was for one singular purpose. He drove into the tight heat of Hux’s body, covering every inch of skin he could reach with his lips and tongue. Sweat dripped from his forehead onto the shining freckled skin of Hux’s back and Kylo could feel him clenching. Precome dribbled across his fingers, a keening moan signalling just how close Hux was.

“Oh god Ren, yes! Harder! Re- ahhh! Kylo!”

Hux felt himself convulse, waves of pleasure pouring from his body and sending shocks through every nerve ending. His cock pulsed in Kylo’s fist to spatter come on the sheets, his back arching as he rode out the aftershocks. Kylo’s breath panted hot in his ear and Hux let out another strangled moan as he was suddenly left empty. Kylo slid the condom off as he pulled out, the heat of his palms circling to grip tight on the cheeks of Hux’s ass, the slick of his cock sliding between them in quick jerking motions. His hips stuttered, staccato movements up the cleft of Hux’s ass, punctuated by a low moan of Kylo’s own.

Hux could feel Kylo’s fingers tightening and his own spent cock twitched at the sensations gliding across his hole. Kylo’s thrusts were rough and hard, faster and faster, the heat rising, his breath catching until finally he shuddered, groaning, the warm stripes of his come coating Hux’s back.

Without warning the full weight of Kylo’s bulk was on Hux, slick with sweat and streaked with come where he lay against his back. Hux’s arms trembled and he fell forward onto the mattress, Kylo covering him completely. They lay, unmoving, chests heaving to catch their breath.

Hux’s mind was a delicious haze of white noise and the warm afterglow that only came with being well and truly fucked. He tried to raise himself only to find he was still pinned beneath the weight of Kylo’s body.

“Mmm, Ren, I can’t quite breathe.” he said, nudging Kylo slightly with his elbow. Ren only mumbled pushing sweaty dark hair from his eyes. He rolled onto his back and Hux could feel the tackiness where their skin stuck together. Flopping down next to him Hux had barely a second thought for his sheets, they could be washed later. He stretched out, sated, the ache in his muscles giving him a bizarre sense of self satisfaction. He idly stroked at Kylo’s arm, feeling the minute hairs tickle at the backs of his fingers.

Kylo shifted, trying to pull himself out of the puddle of comfort and finding his limbs too heavy. He didn’t want to intrude too much on Hux’s life, he really should get dressed and go home. There was just something about lying there, breathing starting to return to normal, the brush of Hux’s fingers on his skin, he never wanted to leave.

Mentally he shook himself. No. One of the few unspoken conditions of this arrangement was that it was only sex, nothing more. Hux didn’t want a relationship and Kylo was almost certain he didn’t either. He groaned and pulled himself to his feet.

“I guess I’ll head home.”

Hux jerked slightly, pulled from some introspection or other, “Hm? You sure, I could make dinner or something.”

“Nah, it’s fine. But y’know, thanks, for the massage and… um, listening and everything.”

“Oh, of course. Any time.” Hux stretched and Kylo’s eyes were drawn to the taut lines of his collarbone, the faintly freckled pale skin. Next time he’d get his mouth on it, he decided. “If it’s all the same to you I’m just going to lie here for a while. You’ve still got your key.” Hux hadn’t bothered getting redressed. He was still lying naked, looking extremely relaxed, arms folded behind his head.

“Sure. See you tomorrow.” Kylo bustled around, dressing quickly and heading out the door with a backwards wave to Hux, who sighed. He didn’t want to move, didn’t want to think, but the loss of Ren’s warmth next to him made him shiver. Goosebumps were starting to rise on his skin and he almost wished he’d asked Kylo to stay.

Eventually though, he spurred himself into motion, padding through the empty silence of his apartment. For once though, the quiet didn’t bring him peace. It was too much, oppressive in its enormity and Hux found himself craving company. Instead though, he focused on dinner and settled down on the couch with a book. It was probably just the post-sex haze wearing off, he’d be fine again in the morning.

Meanwhile, Kylo shouldered into his own apartment to find it full of candles. The air smelled like jasmine and he groaned internally. He heard a scuffle of feet and Poe appeared around the door, hurriedly pulling a shirt over his already tousled hair.

“Hey, Kylo, buddy. Didn’t expect you ‘til later.” He gave a dazzling smile, “Finn’s here.”

“I guessed.”

Poe smiled softly before raising his eyebrows. “So what’s up? Bad date?”

Kylo frowned, “What? No! I was just at Hux’s place.”

“Great! So you’re not seeing anyone right now?” Poe’s face lit up, “Because Finn knows someone you might hit it off with.”

Uncertainty bubbled in Kylo’s chest. Whatever he had with Hux was supposed to be nothing more than a distraction. Stress relief. It didn’t do him any good thinking it might be more. He considered for a second then nodded, “Sure, set it up.”


	4. May

“So it’s your birthday in a couple of days, the 4th isn’t it?” Hux asked, startling Kylo out of a daydream at his desk. “Will your Mum and Dad be visiting?”

Things with Ren’s family seemed to be on the upswing, at least from what he’d been telling Hux. After his last outburst he had apologised to Mitaka and now, whenever something happened, he would actually come to Hux with his problems instead of letting them stew. Hux had noted that a few people in the office were starting to warm to Kylo now, which was a definite improvement, even if it did mean there were less excuses to call him into his office for ‘a chat’.

“No, it’s probably best if I _don’t_ speak to my father any time soon,” Kylo ran a hand through his hair, cheeks pink. “Things are better, but still not great.”

Hux patted him on the shoulder. “I understand. If that’s the case then do you maybe want to go out for a drink that night? It’s been awhile since we had a night out.”

“Actually, I kinda have a date that night. Poe set it up.” Kylo’s voice wavered a little, unsure of how Hux would take the news. Green eyes blinked in a brief flutter, but other than that, his face remained impassive.

Hux digested the information. It wasn’t unusual for Ren to date. In fact, now that he thought about it, Ren hadn’t been out with a single person since they’d started hooking up. He frowned to himself. Maybe he was holding the other man back, keeping him from leading his life the way he wanted. It was entirely possible he was just taking pity on Hux.

After all, Kylo was probably one of the few people who Hux could say knew him well. Was the loneliness he felt in those dark hours of night so obvious? Kylo had been the one to suggest the arrangement after all. Hux cleared his throat, voice low.

“Well I didn’t expect our arrangement to last as long as this, but it was fun while it did.”

Kylo stopped, puzzled. “What? I’ve not even met the woman.” He leaned back in his chair, “Look, maybe if we hit it off and want to make it exclusive then yeah.” He wiggled his eyebrows at Hux, “but until then I see no reason not to keep doing what we’re doing.”

“There’s no need to take pity on me Ren,” said Hux and Kylo rolled his eyes to himself, so he was back to Ren now?

“It’s not pity. It’s fun,” Kylo glanced around to make sure no one was near them before rising up to whisper in Hux’s ear, “you didn’t like me riding you the other night?”

Hux squawked and flapped him away, “We are in public right now!”

“Hmm…” Kylo met Hux’s eyes and bit his lip, “well maybe we should go to your office then?”

Hux couldn’t help but smile, his body already starting to respond to the tone of Kylo’s voice, “Much as I’d like that, I have a meeting in five minutes.”

“Hmph, even I’m not _that_ good.”

“Yes well, if you’re still inclined then feel free to come over sometime after your birthday, I’m sure I can think of some kind of _present_ for you.”

“I look forward to it,” Kylo smiled, suddenly wishing that his blind date could be postponed. Even just dinner with Hux usually turned into a pleasant evening, they spent the same amount of time together as they had before but now Kylo found himself enjoying it more and more.

A few days later and Hux was idly killing time in his apartment. He’d already finished his book and gone for a run and now he couldn’t think of anything to amuse himself. He was just contemplating going to the supermarket when his phone buzzed. A glance at the screen showed the name ‘ **Ren** ’ and Hux straightened up in surprise. Kylo never called him, generally he just turned up.

“Hello?”

“Hey Hux, I know you’re probably busy but this date just isn’t gonna work out. Can you call me in like five minutes and say there’s… I dunno… a work emergency or something?” He sounded exasperated, just a tinge of anger audible to Hux’s ears.

“Um, yes. If you like. That bad?” 

“Let’s just say she’s not my type.” Hux could just picture Kylo, running his fingers through his hair as he usually did when he was nervous. He heard a rustling and Kylo’s voice hissed, “She’s coming back, call me soon.” before hanging up with a click.

Hux peered at his phone for a few moments then settled back into the couch. He waited exactly five minutes. Then he got up to put the kettle on.

Five more minutes, tea ready and phone in hand, Hux called, smirk on his face, voice unctuous, “Hell-oo Ren, it’s your knight in shining armour, calling to save you from your date.”

“Oh, Mr Hux!” Kylo’s tone of surprise was pretty convincing and Hux tried to ignore the jolt that the words ‘Mr Hux’ had sent through him. Ren was still talking, obviously weaving some sort of excuse with his one sided conversation. “Uh huh? Is it that bad? No, no it’s okay, if you really need me I’ll come in to the office.”

Hux rolled his eyes, “You’re so mature.”

“Sure, see you soon.” And with that the phone clicked off again, leaving Hux with a smile on his face.

Barely five minutes had passed before his phone rang again, “Thanks for that.” Kylo sounded almost out of breath and Hux was struck by the image of him dashing away from a date, who in his mind, looked alarmingly similar to Phasma from the copyright department. Kylo continued, a slight tremor in his voice. “So… um… did you still wanna do something for my birthday?”

“Sure, why not, do you want to go out to a bar or something.” Hux suggested. It might be nice to go out, maybe he’d have a chance to meet someone nice, prove to Ren he wasn’t the only one who could get dates.

“Actually, I’ve had enough of bars for one night. I’m just heading over if that’s fine with you?” His voice darkened, “After all, you _did_ mention you had a present for me.” Opening his mouth to reply Hux was cut off, “I’ll be there in about fifteen minutes. See you then.”

Hux blanched, dropping the phone onto the couch, raking his mind for something he could do. His original plan, before Ren had informed him of his date, was simply to take Ren out for a few drinks, maybe get a little squiffy and suck him off on the couch, nothing too special. Now he had no gift, no plan, no time to cook. He popped his head into the fridge, hoping he at least had some wine, when inspiration struck.

Fifteen minutes later and Kylo let himself into Hux’s apartment. It was getting to the point where he couldn’t remember the last time he’d knocked. He could already feel himself relaxing as he stepped through the door. Hux’s voice floated through the hall sounding slightly strained. “I’m in here.” 

Stepping into the living room Kylo felt his mouth fall open. Hux was laid out on the couch completely naked, an expression somewhere between embarrassment and arousal on his face. His body was covered in little swirls and whorls of cream and dotted with strawberries. Kylo’s eyes raked across this display; the little peaks of Hux’s nipples a darker pink than usual, stained by the sweet juice, the trail of cream leading lower, the fiery hair of Hux’s body still bright beneath the thick dessert.

“Happy Birthday,” Hux said, trying to sound seductive and failing miserably as a cold blob of cream slid down his stomach and onto the couch. He scooped it up with one finger and tried not to wince at the sticky stain it had left. The corner of Kylo’s mouth twitched as he watched Hux flick his tongue out to taste before sucking the tip of his finger into his mouth. It was a nice picture, an excellent birthday surprise. There was just one problem.

“This is… really… um…” Kylo could feel the colour starting to rise on his cheeks, “The thing is… I’m allergic to strawberries.” He gave an apologetic smile.

“Oh,” Hux looked down at himself and the cream stains starting to spread where it dripped from his body. “Bugger.” 

“I’ll get you a towel.” 

While Hux mopped himself up Kylo set to cleaning the couch, an amused smile still on his face. It was so cheesy, Hux offering himself up as a birthday present. Although, if Kylo was being honest with himself, he couldn’t say he minded. He thought back to his date earlier. She had been perfectly nice, a little young for him perhaps, but all he had been able to think about was how much he would have preferred to be out with Hux instead. Warmth spread through him as he rubbed rough circles in the fabric, picturing Hux in the bar with him, smiling across the pool table, that little stray lock of hair falling in his face as it so often did.

Oh no. 

Oh no no _no_. 

Kylo blinked, this couldn’t happen. This wasn’t supposed to happen. This was supposed to be sex, nothing more. Little fluttering feelings had no place in this arrangement. Panic bubbled up in his chest, he needed to stop this right now. He scrambled to his feet at the sound of footsteps.

Hux was dressed again, skin glowing and slightly damp from the shower, “Well that could have gone better,” he said dryly. “Sorry, I didn’t know.” He wandered towards the kitchen, “Any other allergies I should be aware of?”

“Just anchovies and penicillin, but I doubt you’re gonna be covering yourself in either of those any time soon.” Kylo followed, sitting himself at the breakfast bar. Nerves bloomed and spread and disappeared again. “The couch is fine by the way, just needs to dry.”

“Oh, thank you.” Hux sounded surprised, “I could have cleaned it myself you know.”

“I know, I just wanted to help out. Call it a thank you for earlier.”

“Oh yes, your date. What happened?” Hux raised an eyebrow and Kylo could feel his cheeks start to redden.

“Nothing major, just some little things. She was a bit younger than I usually go for and I just couldn’t see it working out.” He dropped his head, staring at the countertop. “She beat me at pool,” he mumbled and Hux snorted with laughter, inhaling the water he had just poured himself.

Hux spluttered, water sloshing down his front, coughs torn from his throat. He doubled over, only to feel a large hand slap him on the back and his knees almost buckled. Ren’s hand rubbed circles between his shoulderblades as he inhaled shakily. The warm pressure was still there when he straightened up and Kylo stood next to him, concern etched on his face. Hux shook him off, “I’m fine, Ren,” he said glancing down at his now soaked t-shirt. “This really isn’t my day.”

“Nope, you’re right. It’s _my_ day.” Kylo smiled, “And I think we should make pancakes.”

“Pancakes?” Hux puzzled, watching as Kylo started rummaging through his cupboards, pulling things out and setting them on the counter.

“Yeah, we can have them with the rest of your cream. I’ve got a bit of a craving now.” Kylo licked his lips, determined to find something to focus on that would distract him from the swooping feeling that washed over him now every time Hux caught his eyes.

“Alright then. You measure out the dry ingredients and I’ll get the eggs and buttermilk.” Hux pulled out a mixing bowl and slid it across, “Maybe I’ll find a candle and sing to you.”

“You wouldn’t. I’ve heard you sing.” 

Hux just shrugged and set to whisking eggs, thinking over what Ren had been saying before. He was a sore loser, that much Hux knew, but surely not so bad that he’d call off a date just because they happened to best him. Hux had done that more than a few times and the only thing Ren had done was pout. He passed over the eggs, eyes glazing over as Ren mixed the pancake batter, lost in thought.

Really there was no reason for Ren to come over. Unless he’d just assumed Hux would be free, which of course he was. He always was. Hux’s stomach clenched unpleasantly. Pity. Of course, it always came back to the same thing. Ren’s date hadn’t worked out so of course he’d come to Hux, it wasn’t as if he’d turn him down, poor Hux probably needed the company. 

Squeezing his eyes shut Hux willed the thought away. Ren really didn’t need to bother with someone as pathetic as him. 

“Alright, these are gonna be good!” Kylo’s enthusiasm was evident in his voice and Hux turned to see Ren’s smiling face, spatula brandished like a weapon. He twirled the implement between long fingers expertly flipping the pancakes, the smell of them dragging Hux fully back from inside his own head.

“I’ll get the whipped cream,” he said, slightly shaking himself, not wanting to put a dampener on Ren’s birthday.

“No, it’s fine, I got it.” Kylo grabbed the spray can from Hux’s hands accidently sending a spurt of white onto Hux’s shirt. “Shit, sorry.” He swiped it off with one finger and stuck it into his mouth, tongue sliding up the digit, eyes locked on Hux’s own.

Hux simply sighed and gave a tired smile. “I’ll just go get this into the wash.” He turned only to feel broad hands on either side of his waist, gently tracing beneath the hem of his t-shirt. Leaning into the touch he felt Ren’s head come to rest on his shoulder and the whisper of hot breath on his neck.

“Let me help,” Ren purred, warm hands roving across Hux’s skin, “it’s not a birthday if you don’t have something to unwrap.”

Hux hissed in a breath as a rough finger circled his nipple, sparks starting to jolt downwards making his cock stir. Ren’s other hand pulled at his shirt until he obediently raised his arms. The shirt hit the floor seconds afterwards. 

Kylo leaned back to switch off the gas, sliding the plate of pancakes out the way. The only hunger he felt now was for Hux. 

Stroking down the length of the slim body Kylo could feel his mouth watering, he wanted to taste every inch of that soft skin and make it his own. He turned Hux to face him and felt his breath catch; the green of Hux’s eyes was practically gone, his pupils blown wide with arousal. His cheeks glowed pink, his lips softly parted and Kylo wondered what would happen if he were to kiss them. Hux would probably let him and then things would continue as they always did, nothing more. Kylo didn’t think he could handle that.

Instead he dropped his mouth lower, dancing across narrow collarbones, smiling to himself at Hux’s little gasp of pleasure. He took one rosy nipple into his mouth, rolling the little nub under his tongue, teasing lightly before grazing across it with his teeth. 

His cock twitched in his pants, his own arousal crashing over him in a wave. He needed more. He needed it now. He needed Hux. 

Straightening up he backed away, fingers already undoing his belt. He slid both his jeans and underwear to his knees and bent over the countertop, pushing his ass out in invitation. The granite was cool against his cheek, a single anchor in the flare of heat that burned through him. His voice sounded unfamiliar to his own ears; a low desperate growl.

“Hu-ux, I need you to fuck me, right now.”

In an instant Hux was pressed against him, clothed erection dragging across his skin, hot and heavy even beneath the layer of fabric. Slim fingers trailed up the muscles of his back and Hux’s mouth followed.

“You’re so impatient, at least let me get the lube and everything.” He gave a firm squeeze of Kylo’s ass. “But then again,” he sighed dramatically and Kylo could picture the roll of his eyes, “who am I to deny you your birthday present?”

*****

As they ate together afterwards, basking in the afterglow, Hux found himself warming; Ren didn’t _need_ to bother spending time with him, but a large part of him was glad that he did.

Kylo on the other hand had never felt more unsure in his life.


	5. June

The onset of summer brought with it an increase of heat and the arrival of Hux’s most hated social event: the company picnic. Every year he was forced to make small talk with people he didn’t like and their families he didn’t care about, all while pretending that he was having a lovely time. He knew for a fact that certain people reported to CEO Snoke, telling him exactly what people got up to when they thought they could relax. So, as with everything else in his life, Hux kept his guard up.

The smoky sweetness of barbecue wafted through the air and Hux could feel his stomach rumbling. People were laughing, children shouting and he could see Phasma waving him over to a large cooler where most of the staff from his office were gathered.

“Hey Hux, want a drink?” Phasma held out a bottle before taking a swig of her own. Judging by the empties, she’d been at it a while. Her cheeks were slightly red and her hair was mussed, it still looked perfect though. Hux grabbed the beer from her hands and slid onto the uncomfortable picnic bench next to Mitaka.

“Fine, but I’m just having one.”

“Suit yourself,” Phasma shrugged, “but it wouldn’t kill you to have fun you know?”

“You’ve obviously never been to karaoke with him,” Hux started at Ren’s voice behind him, “he does a great version of Bubblegum Bitch, don’t you Hux?” Kylo grinned and nudged at his arm as Phasma tossed him a beer.

Heat spread up Hux’s neck and he inhaled sharply, “Give me one good reason not to have you killed, Ren.”

Kylo just smirked, tipping the bottle to his lips and swallowing deeply. Pearls of condensation slid down the cool glass to trickle down his chin, the cold liquid sending a shiver down his neck. He dragged the tip of one finger up the wet trail before drawing it into his mouth, eyes locked on Hux.

“I can’t think of a single thing.” he said with a smirk.

Hux could feel a warmth spreading through him that had very little to do with the good weather. Kylo had been pushing it lately, practically jumping him in the hallway at work, and while Hux had been pretty firm about keeping things under wraps while they were at the office, today he was feeling just a little rebellious. He ran one foot up Kylo’s leg, smoothing over the broad muscle of his thigh.

To anyone else the change in Kylo’s expression would have been completely unnoticeable but Hux could see the familiar little nibble Kylo gave his lower lip whenever things were starting to heat up. He eased the pressure off Kylo’s thigh before slipping his shoe off and continuing upwards once more. 

Kylo couldn’t quite believe it. Hux must have had his leg stretched almost ballet-like to be sliding his foot up as far as he was. Light nudges stroked up the inside of his thigh and Kylo shifted to give more room. Hux’s eyes were locked on him, watching every tiny expression that passed across his face. It was the intensity of his gaze that caused Kylo’s breath to catch, Hux’s eyes were starting to cloud over, colour rising up his neck that Kylo suspected had very little to do with alcohol.

Phasma meanwhile, had commandeered the barbeque, somehow still intimidating despite the oven mitt and apron reading ‘Grills Do it Better’. Mitaka hovered nervously behind her, obviously trying to prevent some mishap.

“Come on then, who here likes bratwurst?” Phasma shouted, eyes sweeping across the table. “Hux, you skinny bugger, you want some don’t you?”

Kylo snorted, watching Hux’s eyes widen and a blush of a different kind spread across his cheeks. His foot dropped away immediately. “I’m fine thanks,” he said before downing his beer and reaching instantly for another. Kylo on the other hand felt his stomach rumbling and wandered over to join Phasma. She greeted him with a wide smile and a not particularly quiet drunken attempt at a whisper.

“Kylo you need to get Armitage there to learn to relax more,” she folded her arms, “we’ve been working together forever and he still sits there like I just asked him to jump in a trash compactor.” Kylo looked over to where Hux was perched on the end of the picnic bench, shoulders slightly hunched and looking entirely uncomfortable.

Ignoring the part of him that told him to go over and wrap his arms around Hux, Kylo turned back to Phasma, his own voice much lower than hers. “Why exactly is it up to me?”

“Y’know, you guys are friends or something.” Phasma shrugged, “He’s definitely less of an arsehole when you’re about at least.”

Kylo wasn’t entirely sure what to do with that half compliment so chose to smile and nod. “Why don’t I take over the grill and you can go talk to him?” He wasn’t sure if Hux would appreciate that. He would never admit it but Kylo knew he was somewhat intimidated by Phasma. Still, Kylo had the feeling that they’d get along extremely well given the chance. He’d been out drinking with Phasma a few times and her dry sense of humour was very similar to Hux’s own, maybe because they were both British, Kylo wasn’t sure.

He relieved Phasma of her apron and set to grilling, watching intently as Phasma slid into his vacated seat and leaned over to talk to Hux, passing him another drink as she did so.

Not long after they were laughing together like old friends. Hux wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol or the fact that Kylo had slid in next to him on the bench but he felt far more relaxed than he ever had at one of these work occasions. His concern over people reporting back to Snoke had dissipated and he was actually having a good time.

He should have known it wouldn’t last.

He was too busy watching Kylo snort into some guacamole at some remark Mitaka had made when he heard his phone ringing. Taking it out of his pocket he saw the name **Brendol** and groaned to himself. Phasma looked at him quizzically.

“Problem?”

“My father,” Hux grimaced. “we don’t get on.”

“Well I’ll deal with it then.” Without warning, and with more grace than someone so drunk should possess, Phasma swooped down to swipe the phone from his hand.

“Armitage Hux’s phone, can I help you?” Phasma’s voice was husky, seductive, and sweet as honey. “No I’m sorry, he’s very busy just now, can I take a message?” She stuck her tongue out at Hux who was looking on incredulously. “Okay, bye for now.” Phasma handed the phone back with a grin. “He says he’ll call back.”

Hux whistles, impressed, “That’s the fastest he’s ever gotten off the phone. Thanks.”

“No problem,” Phasma stretched to her full height and clapped her hands together, “now who wants to arm wrestle? I’m looking at you Kylo.” Hux sniggered and slid off the bench wandering towards the toilet block that was behind the next stand of trees. His phone buzzed again and he answered without checking.

“Hello?”

“Ha! I knew you weren’t busy.” Hux’s blood ran cold as Brendol’s voice echoed down the line. “What’s the matter Armitage, don’t want to talk to your dear old dad?” He could practically hear the sneer.

“What do you want?” Hux hissed, his grip tightening on the phone.

“I noticed your company lost the Starkiller deal. What did you do?”

Hux could feel his blood rising, “That was over a year ago, we’ve moved past it.” He didn’t even bother asking why his father thought he had something to do with it. He knew exactly how little Brendol thought of him.

“Yes well your mother saw it and insisted I check in, she has stocks with them you know.”

“That woman is _not_ my mother,” Hux said, voice acidic, “And I don’t need you checking in on me with fake concern. I know very well you think I’m a failure.”

“Well let’s be reasonable Armitage, you can do better.” His father’s voice changed, “Except for that woman you’ve got answering your phone. She sounded completely out of your league.”

Hux looked upwards in the vain hope that something would fall out a tree and knock him unconscious, “Not even _in_ my league Brendol. How many times do I need to tell you I’m gay?”

“Nonsense, you have whatever fun you want right now, but you’ll settle down when I want grandchildren.”

Hux growled, holding the phone tight against his ear, “No Brendol, I really won’t. Goodbye.” He switched the phone off, hands shaking. It was bad enough that his father insisted on gloating at every failure in Hux’s life, but the fact he thought he could control him in any way was just insulting. 

Rage burned through him, a slow simmering fire that only grew stronger as Hux turned his father’s words around in his head. His feet carried him without thinking until he stood at the edge of a small pond, eyes glazed over, seeing through his own reflection. 

He wasn’t sure how long he stood, lost in thought. He’d spent so much of his life trying to live up to his father’s expectations that he’d forgotten what he actually wanted. Glancing over to where his workmates were watching Mitaka and Thanisson arm wrestle, he smiled. The aloof manner he wore like armour was slipping, and he didn’t mind it one bit. Dark hair floated into the water’s reflection like smoke and Hux felt a strong hand on his shoulder.

“Everything okay?” Kylo’s voice was tinged with concern and Hux just sighed.

“Ren, tell me what you know about me.”

“What?”

“Things about me, that you know,” Kylo’s hand was still on Hux’s shoulder, the grip softer now, and Hux gave a terse smile, “please.”

“Well… uh... you’re Armitage Hux, 33, scary, but only when I’m on your bad side. Your birthday is the 15th of October and your favourite colour is pink although if anyone asks you say it’s green. Your accent sounds English but you’re originally Irish, it slips when you get drunk.” Kylo folded his arms, “You love cats but haven’t had a pet one since you were six, you’re a fantastic shot but will only shoot clay pigeons, you were a vegetarian while you were at university but only because your boyfriend was.” Kylo dropped his head, purring into Hux’s ear, “You have freckles all over your body and a birthmark shaped like an apple on your left thigh.” He straightened up, “Is any of this what you wanted to hear?”

“Hmm, almost. What about my sexuality?”

“Well for one thing I really like it, but I’m guessing that’s not what you want to hear. You’re a gay man Hux, you like dudes. Which worked out very nicely for me I might add.”

“You’re right, it did.” Hux ran his fingers up the length of Kylo’s arm, gently steering him away from the pond. “I think you should come with me now.”

Kylo frowned slightly at the sudden change in mood, “Haven’t you been lecturing me all week about doing stuff in public?”

Bristling slightly Hux turned to him, a hardness in his eyes, “Listen Ren, my own father just told me I’ll settle down with a woman when _he_ wants grandchildren. So if it’s alright with you, I’d quite like to prove him incredibly wrong by sucking your dick. Do you have a problem with that?”

Kylo glanced around, most of their group was still crowded around the grill and there was no one else nearby. “Okay fine, but I’m not doing this in amongst the trees.” He tilted his head towards the toilet block, “I’m sure we can get a cubicle.”

“Oh Ren, you don’t like the thrill of getting caught? Knowing that any minute someone could walk in and see us?” Hux’s voice was husky with desire and the sound shot straight to Kylo’s cock. He groaned and shoved Hux towards the grey stone building, hoping there was no one inside.

The instant the cubicle door was locked Hux felt Kylo’s hands on his shoulders, pushing him to sit. He licked his lips, trailing his hands up Ren’s sides, pushing his shirt up to mouth a trail across hard muscles. He heard an exhale of breath and a rough palm slid around to caress the back of his neck. Leaning into the touch he squeezed at Kylo’s thighs, gripping tight as he ran his tongue through the trail of dark hair leading down from Kylo’s navel.

Arousal burned low in Hux’s gut as he palmed the outline of Kylo’s rapidly growing cock. His tongue was thick in his mouth, his lips dry as he unfastened Kylo’s trousers in one deft movement. Pressing his face into dark hair Hux breathed in the heady scent, reaching to wrap one hand around the base of Kylo’s cock. He lapped along the underside, pressing into the nerve cluster at the base of the head with the flat of his tongue. Fingers stroked across his face, smoothing down his hair with a sigh as Hux took the length of Kylo’s dick into his mouth.

Closing his eyes Hux lost himself in the sensations, the weight of Kylo’s cock on his tongue, the scent of his body, the taste of his skin. He bobbed his head, hollowing his cheeks to increase the suction and heard Kylo gasp, a tiny spurt of precome leaking out to be lapped up greedily. His hands found their way to Kylo’s hips as he pushed forwards, taking everything in.

Swallowing, Hux felt a slight sting on his scalp, Kylo’s fingers anchoring themselves in his hair. His hips jerked beneath Hux’s hands, little thrusts that were barely held back. Hux hummed to himself in satisfaction, the vibration earning a muffled moan. Eyes flicking upwards he saw Kylo, his palm pressed to his wet, panting mouth and hummed again, his cock giving a twitch of interest.

Reaching downwards he palmed gently at Kylo’s balls, rolling them in his hand, squeezing and cupping gently. He wrapped his fingers around the base of Kylo’s cock, pulling back to swirl his tongue about the head, hand working in smooth strokes up his length. Kylo hissed out between his teeth, the thrusts of his hips getting more insistent. Relaxing his throat Hux let Kylo push forwards, guiding his movements with a hand on his hip. Saliva filled his mouth as Kylo’s cock hit the back of his throat and Hux moaned.

The salt tang of precome filled his mouth and Hux swallowed down, the muscles of his throat closing about Kylo’s cock causing his movements to stutter. “Shit Hux, I’m close,” he hissed out.

Hux simply grabbed for Kylo’s ass, burying his nose in dark hair and sucking down, desperate to feel Kylo let go. It took only a few more thrusts before Kylo’s fist tightened again and Hux’s mouth was flooded with warmth and the salt tang of Kylo’s come. He swallowed down, licking Kylo through the aftershocks, feeling the tremble of his thighs as he worked his mouth over his softening cock.

Hux grinned, licking his lips at Kylo’s dazed expression, already fumbling with his own buttons. He pushed his underwear down impatiently, taking his dick in hand, never looking away from Ren’s face as he jerked himself.

“Hey,” Kylo mumbled, “let me do that.” He urged Hux to his feet, maneuvering them so that Hux’s hands were pressed against the cubicle door. One hand dropped to his already dripping cock while the other circled up under Hux’s shirt, searching out his nipples to tease and pinch. Hux whined at the first touch, his head falling forwards to expose his neck, which Kylo immediately fastened his lips to.

There was the noise of the door opening and Hux froze even while Kylo continued his tantalisingly slow pace. His hips bucked and he pressed his lips tightly shut, hoping he could keep quiet. Kylo’s hand slipped from his chest to gently cover his mouth and the whisper of his voice sent shivers down Hux’s spine.

“You don’t wanna get caught, do you?”

Lust burned through Hux’s body at the words and he licked at Kylo’s palm, sucking his fingers into his mouth, mimicking his previous actions. The sound of running water filled the bathroom and a cough before the door opened and closed again. 

Kylo drew his fingers from Hux’s mouth, watching the trail of saliva, arousal stirring in his gut despite the fact he’d just come. He sped up the movements of his hand and slid his slick fingers down the crease of Hux’s ass. Brushing against Hux’s hole rewarded him with another whine as Hux tried to back himself onto the probing digits. He pressed in lightly with one finger, circling Hux’s rim while his hand worked his now twitching cock.

“More.” Hux’s breathing was ragged, sweat starting to bead on his forehead. He bucked into Kylo’s hand, hissing out when a second finger breached him. They thrust in time with the movements on his hand, brushing tantalisingly close to his prostate and making Hux want to scream and beg. He was so close to the edge and he was sure Kylo could feel it too.

“Come on Hux, come for me. Let me see you fall apart.” Kylo’s breath tickled the back of his neck and Hux threw his head back, coming with a groan, each spurt coating the cubicle door with his release. Kylo was still whispering in his ear. “God I love this…” he stuttered, “seeing you… like this, I mean.”

Hux just nodded and mumbled, flopping back into Kylo’s arms. His stress was gone, his mind quiet for the time being. Kylo seemed to falter for a moment as he pulled Hux close, holding him tight before clearing his throat.

“We should get back before someone notices we’ve disappeared.” he said, peering out the door to check the coast was clear. “The last thing we need is for someone to have noticed and gone blabbing to Snoke.”

Hux smiled as he refastened his pants, “Even if someone noticed our absence, I don’t think they would assume we came to the bathroom to fuck. Why would anyone say anything to Snoke?”

“You’re right,” said Kylo, “I’m probably just being paranoid.”

Monday found them in Snoke’s office.

“It has been reported that certain _individuals_ were overheard behaving in an inappropriate manner. As the highest ranked in the company I value both your inputs and any insight you could give me.” Snoke peered over the desk at them, eyes glinting.

“I’m sorry Sir, this is the first I’ve heard of anything.” Hux’s heart pounded in his neck and he hopes his nerves didn’t show in his voice. Beside him Kylo’s face was blank, half hidden behind his hair.

“Really? I had heard rumours, both your names were mentioned, and while dating a coworker is not an issue, lewd public acts most certainly are.”

“We are not dating, not a chance! I’m not sure who you have been talking to Sir but your facts are quite sadly wrong.” Hux was on his feet, leaning over the desk, forgetting for a second that this man was in charge of his entire career. All he could think about was getting the cold gaze away from himself and Ren. “The fact that you think these rumours might be true is an insult to both of us.” He gestured to where Kylo sat, still silent. “Now unless there is any real business to discuss, I will be on my way.”

Snoke rose from his chair, managing to loom over Hux despite his frail appearance. “Sit down,” he said in a tone that there was no arguing with. Hux shut his mouth and dropped back into the uncomfortable chair. “I am simply concerned for the reputation of the company. What you do or do not do together could not matter any less to me. Now leave, and tell Ms Atkinson-Smith I need to have a word with her.”

Hux rose gratefully and headed for the door, wondering what Phasma could have possibly done to earn Snoke’s ire. Beside him Kylo’s head was bowed and his eyes fixed firmly on the floor.

His fists were balled at his sides as they walked out. He felt a clap on his shoulder and glanced up to see Hux heading towards his office. There was a deep pang in Kylo’s chest; as much as he wanted to follow, he couldn’t bring himself to. His mind was filled with the image of Hux’s face twisted in anger and the words that now echoed inside his head, _not a chance, not a chance._

Not a chance.


	6. July

“You didn’t need to stop to catch that cat,” Kylo’s exasperation was rising along with the scent of sweat on his skin. 

“I bloody well did Ren, the poor thing was lost. The animal shelter was ten minutes out of our way. It’s not like we have any plans.”

Kylo hissed in a breath, “Fine, no plans. Then why am I here?”

“You’re the one who insisted on joining me on my afternoon run,” Hux said with a shrug, “you tell me.”

Kylo frowned, he knew exactly why he was here, sweating through his clothes, the heat causing irritation to prickle down his neck alongside perspiration. It was Hux. He was addicted.

Try as he may, the flutters he had felt had only increased. Even on the days they were just hanging out Kylo felt it. It was in Hux’s smile, the glint of his eyes when he laughed, the scent of his hair, Kylo couldn’t get enough. And Hux?

Hux had no idea.

Things were busy in the office, important new contracts and so many meetings. Kylo had expected Hux to be more stressed than ever but he was taking it in his stride. It worried Kylo, their arrangement was all he had, with that he at least could touch Hux, feel him, taste him, even if he couldn’t be with him the way he wanted. 

The heat was getting to him too, it burned through him, bringing his blood to boil and thrum beneath his skin. His apartment was too hot, even Poe had sought refuge at Finn’s place, leaving Kylo lying awake every night sweating and writhing and completely without company.

“Fine, you got me,” Kylo said. “I’m here to leech your air con.” He shrugged, plastering a fake smile on his face that was as comfortable as the clothes clinging to his sweaty skin. Hux huffed out a breath, his shoulders sagging in relief.

“You could have just said you know.” He flashed a smile, really, Ren had been so grumpy recently, he wasn’t sure why. Hux liked the heat; after the lukewarm summers at home it was nice to feel the sun on his skin, even if it did burn after about ten minutes. The weather energised him, making him more productive than ever and he was getting a little tired of Ren’s increasingly fractious moods. 

Part of him suspected that boredom was setting in. After all, it had been a few months now and someone as attractive as Kylo couldn’t be expected to spend all their time with a lonely coworker. They would go back to normal soon enough Hux suspected. It was just a matter of time.

“Leech away. I’m just going to get washed,” said Hux, “Feel free to stick the TV or the Xbox on, I shouldn’t be too long. You can jump in after if you want?”

“Mm.” was Kylo’s only reply.

Hux shook his head to himself and wandered to the bathroom. Normally a day like this would be easily fixed with sex. Recently though it seemed like that just made Kylo’s moods worse. Hux had already offered to massage the tension away but that too had only seemed to irritate Kylo more.

The warm patter of the shower was welcome on Hux’s skin, sluicing the sheen of sweat from his body. He leaned back, letting the water wash over his face as he ran his fingers through his hair. He could feel the tension starting to drain from his muscles when he heard the sound of the door opening. Hux didn’t bother turning, only smiled to himself, it seemed Ren’s little sulk was over.

“You couldn’t wait until after I was finished?” he asked, voice light and teasing. There was no answer, just the sound of clothes dropping to the floor and then Kylo’s hands were on his body.

Hux arched into the touch of lips on his neck, barely brushing the damp skin, and the feel of broad palms smoothing up his sides. Kylo’s fingers trailed past his ribs, the slight tickling sensation combined with the hot breath on his neck sending shivers from head to toe. Reaching down Hux palmed himself, squeezing gently and rolling his balls in his palm. His cock twitched into life, the lazy warmth of arousal rising.

Hux could feel the length of Kylo’s body pressed against his own, his skin hotter than the water running down his skin. Wet curls of dark hair clung to him as Kylo pulled back, pressing open lipped kisses down the length of his spine. Wide palms kneaded and squeezed at his buttocks as Kylo moved lower and Hux drew in a breath of anticipation.

Kylo spread Hux’s cheeks apart, mouthing over his tailbone and nuzzling into the crease of his ass. He breathed deep, pressing his lips to the pink pucker, his own cock stirring at the moan Hux let out.

Kylo kissed across Hux’s hole, lapping at the opening with the flat of his tongue, the warm water of the shower bringing the faint taste of soap to the soft skin.

“Ah, Kylo,” Hux breathed out and Kylo buried his face between freckled cheeks once more. He circled Hux’s hole with his tongue, probing gently, one hand sliding down to pump roughly at his own cock. Hux was mimicking his actions, his fist moving in time with the minute thrusts of Kylo’s tongue. Kylo pressed closer, delving as deep as he could reach, savouring the heady taste of Hux’s body. He groaned, already feeling himself close to the edge and slipped a finger of his free hand into Hux alongside his tongue. 

Clenching around him Hux gasped out, “Almost, ah! Just there! I’m so close.”

Kylo crooked his finger, barely pressing at Hux’s prostate, a teasing brush that had Hux keening out. “I need to come. Please Kylo, just a little more.”

Kylo moaned as his orgasm overtook him and he spilled across his own knuckles, he pressed into Hux’s body, adding a second and third finger to drag across the sensitive nerves and push Hux to his climax. “Oh shit, oh god, oh _Kylo_!”

Hux’s body shuddered around him, his knees visibly wobbling as Kylo withdrew his fingers and rose to his feet. “Good?”

Hux pushed his wet hair back and turned to meet Kylo’s gaze, “More than good. If that’s what I get for letting you leech off my air con then maybe I should let you stay here full time.”

Kylo gulped, trying to will away the thrill that Hux’s words sent through him. He broke eye contact, choosing instead to tilt his head back under the running water. Hux was joking, teasing as usual, expecting the friendly banter that had been so common between them before all of this. There was a lump in Kylo’s throat that threatened to choke the false cheerfulness from his voice.

“Careful, I might take you up on that offer.”

Hux rinsed the last of the soap from his hair and stepped out to wrap a towel about his waist. “Well since you’re here anyway I’ll get your clothes washed, you can borrow my robe if you like.”

“What? You mean you don’t want me strutting about naked?” Kylo said, unable to take his eyes from Hux.

With whatever product he used all washed out Hux’s hair was surprisingly long, falling in a darkened copper curtain across his smiling face. His skin was pink, curls of steam rising from narrow shoulders, lithe and elegant despite being clothed in nothing but a fluffy white towel. Kylo gave a soft smile, genuine this time and Hux raised his eyebrows.

“What? Did I miss some soap?” he asked and Kylo’s eyes immediately snapped to his feet, watching the bubbles swirl about his toes alongside the last remnants of their release. He needed to stop this somehow, Hux was a friend and nothing more, he had made it apparent.

_Not a chance_.

Kylo winced to himself and focused on scrubbing the shampoo from his hair. This whole situation wasn’t doing him any good. He swallowed thickly. Maybe if he stopped it soon things still had a chance of going back to normal.

He wrapped himself in the fuzzy green robe, hoping his shoulders didn’t stretch it out too much and wandered into the living room to find Hux sat with a lapful of papers.

“I’ve got a few contracts to finish up, then dinner is probably a good idea.” Hux flicked through a few pages. “How does pasta puttanesca sound?”

“That would be nice, just… uh-”

Hux flicked his eyes up and waved a hand, “Oh, don’t worry, I found a fantastic recipe that doesn’t include anchovies, I remember your allergies,” he shuffled a few more papers, “I don’t even buy strawberry jam any more, since you’re here so often.”

Kylo felt his mouth fall open, the urge to kiss Hux more overwhelming than ever, “You didn’t need to do that for me.”

“Nonsense, it’s nothing.” Hux was reading through his papers now, fingers unconsciously twirling a pen in one hand.

Kylo felt a shudder go through him that had his skin prickling, “Right. Nothing.” he murmured.

“So just how bad is the heat at your place that you’re content to stand and watch me look at contracts?” Hux peered at Kylo, who seemed to be frozen in the middle of the room. “You okay there Ren?”

“Hm? Fine, I just haven’t slept for the last few nights. At least not well.” Kylo dragged his fingers through his wet hair and for the first time Hux noticed the dark circles under his eyes. Looking properly he wondered why he hadn’t noticed before. The lines around Kylo’s eyes were deeper than usual and his skin seemed almost grey, he looked exhausted.

“Well why don’t you go get some sleep then?” Hux said pointing towards his bedroom, “I’ll come wake you when the food is ready.”

Kylo nodded, pulling Hux’s robe around him as far as it would close. He wandered into the bedroom and sagged onto the bed. He would talk to Hux over dinner.

An hour later, paperwork complete, Hux set to cooking. The sky outside bathed the city in a pearlescent orange glow and Hux hummed to himself as he stirred his sauce and set pasta to boil. Leaving things to simmer he peered around the door to his room.

Kylo was fast asleep and curled in on himself like a giant cat. His face was smooth, all traces of the bad mood that had been plaguing him gone for the time being. Hux stood for a moment in contemplation before silently slipping back to the kitchen.

Setting a portion aside for Kylo, Hux ate alone. It was a familiar sensation but strange at the same time. For once Hux didn’t have the crushing ache of loneliness simmering in the pit of his stomach to make his head ache and his limbs grow heavy. Instead he was content, watching the clouds burn as the sun set.

Washing up, Hux considered his options for the night. Clearly Kylo was completely exhausted and needed to sleep, he wasn’t about to send him back to his sweatbox of an apartment any time soon. That left Hux with two options, spend the night on the couch, or share the bed with Kylo. 

The couch was lumpy and worn, Kylo had complained about it enough times on the occasions he had stayed before, and Hux knew for a fact that his bed was comfortable. It was definitely big enough, too many nights he’d spent awake, looking at the empty stretch of bed beside him. He stretched out and glanced at the clock, wondering if it was too early to sleep yet.

In the end he stayed up a little longer, checking emails and flicking through videos online, an odd sense of anticipation filling him, making him unsure of what would happen when he actually tried to sleep.

Eventually though, tiredness began to creep up on him and he slid into the bedroom, not daring to turn on the light. Stripping to his underwear he crawled under the covers, watching as the broad shadow of Kylo’s back rose and fell with his breath. Hux turned to stare at the ceiling and closed his eyes, the soft sound lulling him to sleep.

He awoke surrounded in warmth. Not the sweaty heat of an airless apartment, or the direct burn of the sun, this was softness, pure and simple. His head was cradled on Kylo’s shoulder, one hand thrown across his stomach to nestle beneath the fabric of his robe. Kylo’s face was nuzzled into his hair, his breath coming in soft snuffles that sent a shiver down Hux’s spine. He sighed, leaning into the warmth, and froze.

It was pathetic. _He_ was pathetic, clinging to the first scrap of something resembling affection, part of him already thinking it could possibly be more. He slid out of bed slowly, not wanting to wake Kylo and have to face him. He needed to get some distance between them, desperately. What would Ren even think if he knew the aching warmth that had swept through him?

This needed to stop.

He was already in the kitchen when Kylo padded through, hair tousled from sleep but looking a lot brighter than he had the night before.

“Did I sleep all night?” he croaked out.

“Yes, I didn’t want to wake you, it seemed like you needed the rest. Your clothes are on top of the dryer by the way.”

“Ah, thanks Hux,” Kylo shuffled to himself, not quite sure what else to say. Hux’s brows were creased, his lips tight. Something was bothering him.

The urge to go over and wrap Hux in his arms rose like bile in Kylo’s stomach and he turned about, suddenly needing to be dressed. The sooner he got his head sorted out, the better. He needed some distance and time to think and floating around Hux’s apartment wearing the robe that smelled so much like him was not going to help in any way.

Hux had just poured his morning tea when Kylo reemerged fully dressed. He breathed in, the warmth of the cup in his hands steadying him. “Hey Kylo?”

“Yeah, Hux sorry, I’ve gotta go.” Kylo caught his lower lip between his teeth, “Listen though. This whole _arrangement_ thing, could we maybe call it quits?”

The question hit Hux like a punch in the gut, despite the fact he was about to make the same suggestion. They had agreed though, months ago, no questions asked. There was no use feeling rejected. This was for the best. “Yes, that’s fine, I-”

Hux stopped himself, telling Kylo he’d been thinking the same thing served no purpose except to make himself feel better. “I’ll see you at work on Monday then?”

“Sure, see you then.” Kylo scrambled out the door and wrenched it shut behind him before Hux could see his face. He swallowed against the rising lump in his throat, eyes burning.

This was for the best.


	7. August

“You’re sure you’re okay Kylo?” Poe asked, dark eyebrows creased in concern. “You’ve been pretty quiet lately.” He peered at Kylo sitting silent his room. “I’m getting worried.”

Kylo sighed, “I’m fine. It’s nothing really.”

Poe folded his arms and leaned against the doorframe, “Come on, you’ve been hanging about here every day and night for the last couple of weeks. Did you and your buddy Hux have a fight or something?”

“Something like that,” Kylo muttered and Poe strode in to clap a hand on his shoulder.

“Anything I can do to help? Finn and I are heading out with Jess and a few other folks for dinner later if you wanna come along.”

“No, it’s fine.” said Kylo as he slumped against his pillows. The apartment was stifling and while Hux had mentioned that he could come over at any point to get away from the heat, Kylo still couldn’t bring himself to go over. 

“Alright, but it could do you some good. You’ve not had a date in months, you never know who you might meet.”

Kylo could feel anger starting to rage through him, heating his blood even more than the oppressive summer humidity. “I said it’s fine!” he snapped, “I don’t want to meet anyone, I don’t need a date, I don’t need to go out, I don’t want anyone but-” he shut his mouth instantly, colour already rising to his cheeks.

Poe’s head tilted, “Anyone but- who? Oh! _Ohhh_.” His eyes widened and then the hand was back on Kylo’s shoulder. “You’ve got a thing for him haven’t you? Hux I mean, that’s why you’ve not been hanging out, am I right?”

Marvelling at Poe’s sixth sense for relationship issues, Kylo just nodded, not wanting to go into any further details and Poe settled down next to him. “So what’s the problem, does he not feel the same?”

“He doesn’t know how I feel.” Poe opened his mouth and Kylo cut him off, “Before you say anything, no, I’m not telling him. I know for a fact I don’t have a chance.”

“If you’re sure,” Poe said, lips pursed, “what’s your plan then? Just hang about here until the feelings go away? It’s not fair to Hux if you’re avoiding him.”

Kylo glanced towards his phone, he’d only seen Hux on his rare days at work, dodging any invitations to hang out, afraid of his own feelings. He missed Hux though, laughing with him, cooking with him, even just having someone to talk to about his ridiculous family. Poe was good company and Kylo appreciated his advice, but it wasn’t quite the same. His family life was fairly happy and while Kylo probably _could_ open up to Poe, he wasn’t entirely sure he’d understand.

Kylo sighed, he’d been taking advantage of his freelance status to stay at home but Poe was right, he couldn’t avoid Hux forever. “I’ll go in to the office after lunch. I’ll talk to him then.”

“That’s good,” said Poe, “although I still think you should tell him how you feel. Even if he doesn’t feel the same.” He looked at Kylo, concern in his eyes, “You can’t keep it bottled up forever you know.”

“Mm,” Kylo nodded, “I’ll think about it,” and Poe grinned.

“You never know, he could feel the same, then you’d be thanking me.”

Kylo gave a thin smile, already knowing in his heart that Hux wasn’t interested. Guilt bubbled in his stomach for even considering the chance of something more. Hux was his friend and he was lucky enough to have that. He wasn’t about to jeopardise things for the sake of something that _might_ be.

*****

“It has come to my attention that your work has been slipping.” Snoke peered at Hux over his steepled fingers. “You have been distracted lately and I sincerely hope this is not an indication of future performance.”

Hux pushed lank hair from his face, exhaustion making his every movement heavy, “I can only apologise Sir, I’m afraid I haven’t been sleeping well recently.”

Snoke leaned back in his chair, expression inscrutable. “Have you perhaps been having trouble in your-” he gave a delicate cough, “-personal life?”

With dawning horror Hux realised that this was Snoke’s attempt at kindness and tightened his grip on the arm of his chair, hoping it would be over soon. Snoke had risen from his seat and wandered over to the tiny office window, his silhouette cast over the floor like some sort of spectre. “I couldn’t help but notice that Kylo Ren has been somewhat absent of late.”

Hux blanched, “That is nothing to do with me.” Sure he and Kylo had barely spoken recently but that had nothing to do with his attendance at work. Before they had become friends he had been in and out of the office whenever he pleased, something that had only compounded Hux’s irritation with him at the time. “Kylo’s work habits have never been predictable.”

“Yes,” Snoke turned, “but we’re not talking about _Kylo’s_ work habits, we are talking about yours.” He let out a sigh that whistled like wind through a graveyard, “If it is an issue of exhaustion then I think it may be prudent to grant you a day’s leave.” His eyes glinted, steely and cold, “You understand that I expect your work to be back to its usual standard when you return?”

“Of course Sir, but you really needn't-” Hux was stopped by Snoke’s glare.

“Yes, I needn’t, but I will. I have high expectations of you,” Snoke’s face twisted in something that could almost be called a smile, muscles that had maybe been used once in the last six decades creaking into life, “Enjoy your time off Armitage.”

Hux could feel a nerve starting to twitch in his eye and nodded, “Thank you Sir.” He scrambled out of the office with as much decorum as he could muster. Part of him was relieved to get away from work although he doubted one day would do much to counteract the weeks of little to no sleep. He couldn’t help it. He’d slept fantastically for the few days after Kylo had shared his bed, until he’d had to wash his sheets. After that, no matter how hard he tried, he simply couldn’t relax. Not even a cheeky shower wank would take the edge off and his frustration only continued to grow.

“I’m not going to be in tomorrow,” Hux leaned into Phasma’s office, “Snoke’s orders.”

Eyes flicking up from her laptop for the briefest second Phasma nodded, “I know, he already mentioned to me.” Her eyebrows raised behind chrome rimmed glasses. “Honestly, you should just head home now. You look like shit. The place won’t blow up without you.”

“You’re so kind,” Hux said, a smile half formed on his face. “Let Kylo know if you see him.”

“Mmhmm,” Phasma nodded again, eyes on her screen, fingers tapping across the keyboard. Hux’s head disappeared and Phasma muttered to herself, “Bloody idiots.”

A few hours later found her in conversation with Mitaka and Unamo from Hux’s department. “Honestly, one of them has to say something soon, it has gone on long enough.”

“I dunno,” said Mitaka, “they’re both pretty stubborn, I personally think it’ll be a while yet.”

“Twenty bucks says it’s another month before they make a move.” Unamo shoved a hand in her pocket, pulling out a note and waving it in Mitaka and Phasma’s faces. Mitaka bit his lip, eyebrows raised on worry.

“I’m really not sure we should be betting on coworkers.”

“Who are we betting on?” Phasma turned to see Kylo wandering into the office, eyes darting around. Mitaka gave a little squeak and shut his mouth, instinctively standing straighter.

“Oh nothing,” Phasma waved her hand, “we were just wondering when Matt from maintenance is gonna ask out the little redhead from IT.” She glared pointedly at Mitaka whose face was starting to redden. Handing over her own money she took another look at Kylo, still peering around the office, “I’m going for sometime soon, they’re not _that_ stupid, surely!”

Mitaka steeled himself and pulled out a crumpled note, “The end of the year.” His eyes flicked to where Kylo was conspicuously hovering at the door of Hux’s office, “They definitely _are_ that stupid.”

“Fair enough,” shrugged Phasma. “I guess I should help him out. Hey Kylo!”

Kylo’s head snapped up, “Hey, have I missed much? I know I’ve not been in recently.”

“Not really. Hux isn’t here if that’s why you’re standing about, he’s out sick for the next couple of days.”

“Oh,” said Kylo trying to ignore the hollow that had formed in the pit of his stomach, “I guess I’ll see him later then.” He traipsed to his desk, not noticing the glance Phasma and Mitaka shared and the roll of Unamo’s eyes.

The day seemed to drag itself out making Kylo’s skin prickle and itch with something halfway between anticipation and nerves. By the time he reached Hux’s door that evening his heart was pounding. He shook himself, willing away the tremor as he raised his hand to knock at the door, and paused.

Why was he knocking? He had his key, and changing his usual behaviour meant admitting that things were different now. Wrenching his hand back as if burned Kylo closed his eyes and breathed deep.

“Hey Hux I heard you were off sick so I brought you some pho from that place you like.” Kylo strode through the hallway as if the last few weeks had never happened. “Gotta say, when I heard Snoke had authorised it I thought Phasma was kidding.”

He stepped into the living room to see Hux, hair dishevelled, half asleep under a blanket and watching a documentary on big cats. He blinked slowly, stretching himself as he rose. “I wasn’t expecting you,” he paused, “but then again I very rarely am. How are you?”

“Fine, nothing new.” Kylo felt a smile come to his face unbidden, somehow just being in the same room as Hux had him feeling better. He held up the takeout bag. “I’ll get some bowls, you stay here, you don’t wanna be moving about too much if you’re sick.”

Warmth bloomed through Hux, had Kylo really come over to make sure he was okay? “I’m not actually sick,” he said, “I don’t _get_ sick. I’ve just been a little tired lately. Nice of you to come look after me though.”

“Any excuse for pho.” Kylo returned with a pair of steaming bowls and settled down on the couch, “What are we watching?”

“The Life of Mammals.” Hux shifted to give Kylo some room and threw his blanket to one side, the heat of Kylo’s body so close more than warm enough for him.

“Oh Attenborough, nice.” Kylo leaned forward to slurp at his noodles and Hux felt a sense of peace fall over him. This was more like it. This was the easy friendship he had been used to. Things might just work out alright after all.

Two bowls of noodles and three episodes of pleasantly voiced narration later and Hux’s head was starting to droop. His eyes were heavy, his body deliciously warm. It would be so easy just to curl into the heat of Kylo’s body and sleep. Unconsciously he slid closer, his hand brushing against Kylo’s, their fingers just grazing together. There was a harsh intake of breath and Kylo’s hand was snatched away as he sat bolt upright.

“Ah! I- I should head back to my place, you need your sleep.” Kylo stuttered out, already rising to his feet. His stomach was in knots, the unexpected touch sending thrills through every nerve. His heart hammered so hard he was sure Hux could hear it. “Give me a call if you need anything done at the office tomorrow.” He could feel heat rising to his ears, his body suddenly too big and too clumsy. He’d let his guard down and now all he wanted to do was throw himself at Hux and beg for him to maybe even slightly possibly feel the same way.

“Oh- yes, I will, thanks.” Hux blinked as Kylo shoved his shoes on, practically bolting for the door. He twisted the folds of the discarded blanket between his fingers, wondering exactly what had caused the sudden departure.

 _Oh_.

It was obvious really when he thought about it. Kylo had been fine up until the moment their hands had touched. He was clearly trying to avoid the contact. Disgust gnawed at Hux, it was his own fault for being so pathetic. No wonder Kylo shied away from him. Obviously Kylo didn’t want him to think their physical relationship had the remotest chance of continuing. 

Well then, he thought, message received.

Bundling the blanket up Hux shoved it in the laundry cupboard, giving it a couple of extra punches, just to make sure it fit of course. After weeks of nothing things had been almost back to normal. Hux hadn’t realised just how much he missed it. And all it took was one single touch to make things awkward again. He inhaled deeply, trying to calm his mind. Things could still be okay, he was sure of it, all they needed to do was avoid physical contact. Clearly Kylo wanted to avoid it so Hux would respect his wishes.

He slid into bed with a frown. It wasn’t as if he’d been trying to lure Kylo to bed. A small part of him missed that, it was true. Tonight though he’d just been sleepy, he still was.

Lying back Hux tried to recall those brief moments of cosy contentment. The heat beside him, the almond scent of Kylo’s hair, the sound of his breath. He sank into the memory, frown lines lessening until finally, for the first time in weeks, Hux slept soundly.

He dreamed.

His dreams were filled with soft sensations and images with blurred edges. Floaty pastel visions of himself danced in a garden filled with strawberries, little snatches of conversation just audible in the distance.

And then the dream shifted. Hux found himself walking into his own apartment. This dream was a little more solid, he could feel the carpet beneath his feet, sliding between his toes like blades of grass. The air was filled with steam and the smell of cooking.

“Welcome home.” Hux was wrapped in warm strong arms and a pair of plush lips found his neck, nibbling and sucking. Breath was hot in his ear and a warm voice whispered, “I missed you.”

Turning, Hux found himself eye to eye with Kylo who smiled and leaned in, making Hux’s breath catch in his throat. His lips were impossibly soft as they pressed against Hux’s own, catching and sliding and then pressing in once more. One hand caressed Hux’s neck, gently tilting his head back to let his mouth fall open. Kylo’s tongue traced the outline of his lips before slipping in to tangle with Hux’s in a sliding dance of hot breath and sweet taste. Hux groaned, his hands rising to tangle in thick hair, gripping tight as he was lifted into Kylo’s arms.

His legs wrapped around the hard press of Kylo’s body as he led them to the couch before collapsing on top of Hux, their mouths never parting for an instant. Kylo stripped his t-shirt off in a single movement, eyes glinting as he looked down at Hux sprawled on the couch.

“Kylo I-” Hux started before that mouth was on his once more, dipping and tasting, their bodies grinding together almost painfully. Kylo pulled back, his lips pink and starting to swell.

“Tell me what you want Hux.”

“You. Just you.” Hux pulled himself up to wrap his arms around Kylo’s chest.

And woke up holding a pillow.

He lay there in the early morning light with nothing but an empty bed and an erection, wondering how things had gotten like this. As pale sunlight streamed through the window only one thing was certain.

Kylo could never know.


	8. September

Kylo had been in a theatre group in college. He had been in a single play and quit after a reviewer had deemed his performance ’unconvincing’. He wished that person could see him now.

It was as if a force field separated himself and Hux, requiring them to be at least a foot apart at all times. There had been no accidental touches, no little brushes of skin against skin. From an outside perspective everything seemed fine. Internally though, Kylo was being torn apart. He was too afraid to face his feelings, too convinced of rejection, too convinced that Hux could never consider them as anything more than friends. And to his credit Kylo was keeping up that pretense very well. They laughed and joked, he teased Hux, they made food and played videogames and watched movies. And every day Kylo fell just a little bit more.

Hux on the other hand was in complete denial. It was just a little crush, nothing more, it would be over soon, they’d stopped sleeping together, it would be easy. But each lopsided smile, each sparkle of golden brown eyes, each conspicuous gap between them on the couch sent a pang of want through his chest. He reasoned that the pain of want was at least better than the pain of not seeing Kylo. It was something he could cope with.

Still they continued.

Today Hux was lurking behind his office door, peeking through the glass every so often to catch a glimpse of Kylo at his desk. He was considering asking him if he wanted to go to lunch when he saw Kylo pull out his phone and frown. As Hux watched Kylo’s eyes widened and he scrambled out of his chair and headed straight for Snoke’s office.

Hux sighed and returned to his desk. Probably another out of office contract for Kylo to deal with. He’d just have to catch up with him later.

A few days later and Hux was starting to worry. While Kylo being out of the office was nothing new, he hadn’t replied to any texts. Hux had even tried calling, something he never usually did but still there had been no answer. He found himself wondering if he had somehow overstepped their boundaries and done something to make Kylo uncomfortable. He was sitting at his desk tying himself in knots when Thanisson knocked on his door. “Snoke wants to see you.”

“Oh god, what have I done this time?” Hux rose hands clenching into fists, unconsciously digging his nails into the soft skin of his palms. He knocked on the heavy black door of Snoke’s office, dread surrounding him like a stormcloud.

“You wished to see me?” Hux lowered himself into one of the uncomfortable hard backed chairs.

“Yes, I simply wished to inform you that the Sienar-Jaemus meeting has been postponed. We will reschedule when Kylo Ren returns.”

Hux nodded, “Yes Sir,” his voice wavered a little, “I don’t suppose you know when that might be? I haven’t been able to contact him recently.”

Snoke’s face flickered with something resembling surprise, “I’m sorry, I expected you to know. His mother passed away unexpectedly, the funeral is tomorrow.”

Hux’s breath caught in his throat, a sudden flurry of sadness tinged with panic sweeping through him. “Oh, I- I didn’t know.” There was nothing he could do to help, he knew that, but he wished he’d known, he should _be there_ for Kylo in some way. His fists clenched in his lap, the sheer helplessness overwhelming his senses.

Snoke pressed his fingers to his lips in contemplation. “Yes, most unfortunate, I can’t imagine how he might be feeling.” He leaned forward in his chair. “On a completely unrelated note, I understand you have a few leave days to use up. May I suggest you take them soon?”

Hux narrowed his eyes, “Sir? Are you suggesting-”

“I’m not suggesting anything, merely pointing out you are entitled to paid leave,” Snoke sighed, voice dry as parchment, “and since your meetings have been rescheduled now may be the ideal time to take it.”

“Ok, I’ll- I’ll do that.” Hux hurried from the office, not daring to glance back, just on the off chance that whatever spirit was possessing Snoke chose that moment to disappear. He reached for his phone, already looking up flights.

*****

Kylo was numb. His head was clouds. Nothing made sense any more. How could the world still be turning without such an important component? His father drifted in and out of his awareness, sometimes speaking, mostly staring; at Kylo, into space, it didn’t matter.

The hollow ache in his stomach showed no signs of abating as he pulled on his suit methodically, movements robotic. His hands trembled, the knuckles cracked and split where he’d driven his fist into the wall. He and his father had almost come to blows too many times to count, the burden of grief only driving them further apart. Kylo had no other place to go though, he at least owed it to his mother to stay.

“Here, kid.” The voice of Kylo’s father jolted him from within his own mind and he barely reacted in time to catch the tub that was tossed in his direction. “Petroleum jelly, for your hand, I couldn’t find anything else.” Han paused in the doorway, the lines on his face deeper than Kylo had ever seen them, “Hey Benny I-”

Kylo’s brows clashed together, “ _Don’t_ call me that!” He gripped hard on the dresser with both hands, glaring at his own face in the mirror.

“Okay _fine_!” snapped Han, “Your Uncle Luke will be here in a half hour. If you don’t want to speak to him then I suggest you make your own way there.” He stalked away and Kylo could hear the sound of a door slamming down the hall. Doubling over Kylo gritted his teeth and tried to hold back the sob that threatened to break from his chest. This was his mother’s fault, if she hadn’t-

No.

She didn’t deserve that. Even when everything had gone wrong she had still believed in him. Kylo sniffed, tears so close to spilling. He breathed deep, in an attempt to ground himself straightening his suit and pulling his hair into a bun. He clenched his fists and closed his eyes before taking the tub that Han had left for him, smoothing the soothing gel over his hands and taking away the sting. For now.

The service was short and sweet with Kylo drifting through it unthinking. His uncle was too busy consoling his father to pay him much heed and when they came to the cemetery Kylo found himself standing alone.

The day was cool, the first hints of Autumn chill just making themselves known. It was exactly the sort of day Leia would have liked and Kylo found himself suddenly facing the gaping void that was the world without her. His chest constricted, his breath coming in short gasps. There was no one around him, no one noticed, no one cared. Tears filled Kylo’s eyes blurring the leaves surrounding him into a swirl of reds and yellows and a sudden bloom of bright copper.

“It’s okay, I’m here.”

Slim arms wrapped themselves around Kylo’s neck and he buried his face into the softness that was Hux’s hair. “I got the information from Poe, I hope that’s okay.” Hux murmured, his hand stroking absentminded circles on Kylo’s back.

Kylo didn’t answer, so overwhelmed with Hux’s presence. His body heaved in wracking sobs, his tears rapidly spreading a damp patch across Hux’s shoulder. Hux simply held him tighter, it was all he could do.

When eventually the tremors began to fade Kylo let Hux steer him towards the rest of his family, his hand settled protectively in the small of Kylo’s back. He noticed a few stares and a soft smile from his uncle that he couldn’t help but return. Things weren’t any better, but he at least felt steady enough to make it through the rest of the day.

The wake was held at Kylo’s childhood home, a place that, in Hux’s opinion, wasn’t nearly as bad as he’d made it out to be. He’d made some awkward conversation with a few people, including Han, who seemed to be just as unsure of the nature of Kylo and Hux’s relationship as they were. He’d offered Hux the spare room and pointedly mentioned that he’d be staying with his friend Chewie that night. Hux had simply nodded and spent the remainder of his time hovering awkwardly around the kitchen.

Kylo had headed to bed fairly early and when Hux finally decided to call it a night his door was firmly shut. Hesitating, Hux hand raised his hand to knock before instantly reconsidering and turning for the spare room. He lay awake in the dark for what felt like hours until the faintest of noises had him jolting upright.

The sound of barely suppressed sobs only grew louder and Hux stepped into the hall in nothing but his underwear. He’d barely had time to pack in his haste. This time, when he reached Kylo’s door there was no hesitation. Hux didn’t knock, just slipped like a shadow into Kylo’s room.

“Kylo?” His voice quavered in the dark, a shiver crawling up Hux’s spine. Kylo was turned away from him, the bare skin of his back faintly visible in the low light.

“Hux? Can- can you lie with me?” 

Hux’s heart hammered in his throat, the distance between them all too real. Lowering himself onto the bed he settled behind Kylo. They had barely touched in weeks before their hug today and Hux could already feel the butterflies in his stomach that this closeness brought. He swallowed, glancing down at the gap between their bodies on the narrow bed, willing himself to cross that line.

“I know I asked if things could stop,” said Kylo, his voice barely above a whisper, “but can we maybe make an exception tonight?” He reached back, hand brushing tentatively across Hux’s own. His face was hidden by hair and Hux felt a pang of sorrow ripple through him. He could already feel the heat radiating from Kylo’s bare skin despite the space between them. He inched closer, his hand coming to rest on Kylo’s hip. He couldn’t deny how badly he craved the touch.

“What do you need Kylo?”

Kylo squeezed his eyes shut, hoping Hux couldn’t see his face. “You, Hux. I need you. Just... touch me. Please.”

“I didn’t bring anything.” Hux mumbled, the raw intensity of Kylo’s voice burning through him, setting his nerves ablaze.

“I don’t care, I need you, you _know_ you’re the only person I’ve been with this year. Please.” Kylo choked back a sob, despair threatening to overcome him once more. “I don’t want to think any more, I just need to _feel_ something. I need _you_ Hux.”

Slim arms wrapped around him, holding tight and Kylo felt the whisper of breath on the back of his neck. 

“It’s okay Kylo, I’m here, I’ve got you.” 

Hux’s lips were soft, pressing kisses up the length of Kylo’s neck, making him sigh out. He pressed back, slotting himself into the curve of Hux’s body, needing to have as much of their skin connected as possible. One hand rubbed circles on Kylo’s thigh while the other stroked across his shoulders and neck and Kylo leaned into the touch.

Tracing the shell of Kylo’s ear with his tongue Hux inhaled deeply. Kylo’s hair smelled like almonds, the soft waves brushing against his face in silken curls. His heart pounded, this was the closest they had been in a long while, still overly cautious around each other. But here, now, Hux couldn’t imagine being anywhere else. 

His fingers trailed down Kylo’s stomach, slowly, reverently and Hux pushed himself closer, pressing against Kylo’s back, lips fixed on his pulse, feeling it flutter as much as the butterflies in his stomach.

“Ah, Hux!” Kylo breathed out, gently taking hold of Hux’s wrist. He raised it to his lips, pressing kisses to Hux’s fingertips, feeling the growing hardness behind him. Kylo rocked his hips, grinding slowly back. The hollow emptiness he had felt since he’d returned home was starting to lessen. The numbness was turning to feeling, a heady rush of wants and needs that centred entirely on Hux. 

Kylo’s cock was starting to fill, a low simmering heat coursing through him as Hux’s lips pressed against his throat. It was slow, unhurried, none of the desperate need to get off that had buoyed them forwards in the past. Hux’s fingers slid down the length of his throat in a gentle caress, dancing across his nipples and then downwards, the flat of his palm circling the planes of Kylo’s stomach. 

Hux nuzzled his nose into Kylo’s neck, feeling the slight sweat that was starting to rise from his heated skin, dampening his hair into loose waves. He paused for a second to shimmy out of his boxers and watched as Kylo did the same, pyjamas kicked to the bottom of the bed.

Hux didn’t speak, fearing it would break the spell that seemed to have settled over them. Light from the street outside danced across Kylo’s skin, highlighting the marble sculpture of his body and darkening his moles to little pinpricks of night. One cluster on Kylo’s shoulder seemed to call out to Hux, begging to be kissed and he fastened his mouth to them as he dropped his hand to squeeze gently at Kylo’s ass.

Eyes still closed, Kylo reached back, his hand finding the delicate jut of Hux’s hip, their arms brushing across one another, soft and hesitant. 

The rasp of Hux’s stubble was a counterbalance to his lips, punctuating each soft kiss with a rougher undertone that sent tremors through Kylo, threatening to tear a sob from his lips. This was too much, too gentle, far sweeter and nicer than he deserved. How could Hux not feel his heart pounding with every touch?

He hissed in a breath as a slim finger slid between his cheeks, softly brushing across his hole. Hux circled, brushing in gentle sweeps, only just catching at the rim to send jolts through Kylo’s body. He pushed back, needing more, needing the pressure and the push, the slight sting. He needed Hux, desperately so, and groaned out in frustration.

“Shh… just give me a minute, we don’t have any lube,” Hux murmured, lips brushing across his shoulder. The hand was removed and Kylo could heat the wet slurps of Hux sucking his fingers. They returned wet with saliva, pushing inside to tease and coax at Kylo’s prostate, tickling to start with and growing into a throbbing, almost desperate need.

“Vaseline on the nightstand.” Kylo said, voice muffled against the pillow. “Want you in me.” His nerves were jangling, his skin burning with every light touch. He needed more. 

“Okay,” Hux breathed out, “okay. Don’t know how I missed that.” he muttered, grabbing for the tub, not willing to break contact with Kylo for more than an instant. He slicked himself with one hand, dick twitching at the touch. Slowly and gently he pressed forwards, nudging at Kylo’s entrance with the head of his cock. 

Kylo sighed gratefully at the first push, not caring for the slight ache that came from being a couple of months out of practice. Hux was hard and hot inside him, barely moving but still setting his nerves on fire with every inch he pressed forwards. One of Hux’s hands found his hip, his other arm snaking beneath him to wrap around his chest, pressing him close. When he was finally fully seated Hux exhaled, his breath warm on Kylo’s neck.

“Don’t move yet,” Kylo said, his hand coming to rest atop Hux’s on his thigh, “just stay, like this, just for a little while.”

Hux simply nodded, his forehead pressed between Kylo’s shoulder blades. His mind was swirling, this wasn’t like before; his heart pounded in his ears, fingers gripped tight on Kylo’s thigh. His mind told him that Kylo only wanted this because he was hurting and he needed distraction but Hux couldn’t bring himself to care. He would give everything he had to settle Kylo’s mind, drive out his pain with his body. Even if it were only for this one night.

Soon Kylo started to move, gently rocking back into Hux, soft breaths falling from his lips. Hux circled his hips, moving in long, slow, unhurried strokes, barely pulling out of Kylo’s body before sliding home, his arousal a low burning fire. His skin prickled, hot and cold washing over him. Kylo gasped out his name, back arching, his fingers gripping tighter on Hux’s hand.

He set a slow pace, wanting to savour the sounds Kylo made, each movement only serving to intensify the heightening pleasure that thrummed through him. Hux could feel the sweat beading on his skin, making him shiver with hot and cold as Kylo arched against him. Driving forwards he could feel the steady build in his cock, the delicious pressure that was increasingly close to spilling over. Dropping his head to Kylo’s neck, Hux pressed his mouth against the ridges of his spine, mapping them with his tongue in an attempt to make things last. Who knew when he would get this chance again.

Kylo’s cock bobbed with each new movement, his breath starting to speed. Every small thrust sent ripples of pleasure through him, drop by drop until the sensations threatened to flood him. He could feel the press of Hux’s lips on his skin, slightly chapped, skin rough, a single cool point in the rapidly heating air, and he leaned into the touch. 

Of course, he reasoned, Hux was just helping him out, as before. That didn’t stop the overwhelming desire, the powerful need for everything and anything that Hux was willing to give him. He clenched around Hux, every new movement sending sparks up his spine, making his cock twitch and leak. Breath shuddered in Hux’s chest where he pressed against Kylo’s back and Kylo could feel the steady thickening inside him. Shifting, Hux moved to pull out and Kylo stopped him with a hand on one trembling thigh.

“It’s fine Hux. Let go,” he whispered, “come in me. I want it.”

“Ngh! Kylo. Oh-” was all Hux managed before his hips stuttered. Kylo felt the swell of his cock followed by the hot pulse of Hux’s come spilling inside him and moaned. Hux’s arms wrapped entirely about his chest, his hips working in jerky little thrusts as he rode out the sensations. 

“Hux, I-” Kylo gasped out, clenching again as Hux’s hand found his cock. It only took a few light strokes before Kylo was groaning, coating the bed and his stomach in wet stripes.

Breathing hard, Kylo felt lighter than he had in days, securely anchored with Hux’s arms around him. Their bodies shuddered together, the heady afterglow washing over them. Kylo held Hux’s arms against him, wanting to keep him there for as long as he would stay. They didn’t speak, neither sure of where they stood with each other, just relishing the closeness that might not come again.

*****

Morning brought cool, pale sunlight that crawled across Hux’s face, waking him. He rolled over to find the bed empty and sat upright to see Kylo on the floor, rummaging through his bag. 

“Hey,” he said, when he noticed Hux’s eyes on him.

“Good morning.” Hux pulled the covers around him, conscious of his nakedness. Kylo didn’t seem to notice, only giving a tired smile, his eyes red rimmed and tinged with sadness.

“Thanks again for coming,” said Kylo, eyes never rising from the floor, “you’re a really good friend Hux.”

Hux swallowed at the word, trying to ignore the sensation that his heart had just been crushed in a vice grip and nodded, a false smile on his lips.

“Always.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Illustration for this chapter can be found [here](http://moonwalkingcrab.tumblr.com/image/158450928799). Commission by the amazing 


	9. October

While the days turned colder and the leaves got brighter Hux and Kylo seemed to be at a standstill. Their conversations were, on the surface, the same as they had always been but an undercurrent of tension seemed to pervade their every interaction. It had gotten to the point where they no longer spent any time at Hux’s apartment, it was too much of a danger zone. Instead they had taken to going out, runs in the park, pool in the bar and too many movies to count. If they weren’t each so convinced the other wasn’t interested they were practically dating, something which continued to confuse and infuriate the rest of the office staff.

“Okay fine!” said Unamo, “I’ve got another twenty that says Hux breaks first, have you seen him lately? He spends most of his time mooning in his office.” She turned, exasperated, pointing a finger in Thanisson’s face, “I swear, if he doesn’t say anything soon I am locking them in the supply closet until they get their shit together!”

“Against the rules,” Mitaka said with a smug smile, “no outside influence.”

“Oh come on, tell that to Snoke.” Unamo crossed her arms, her brows creased in a frown.

“I don’t need to, he had the end of September.” Mitaka produced a notepad, a smirk playing about his lips. The smallest twinge of guilt ran through him, it _was_ a little unfair to be profiting off his coworker’s misery but he rationalised that the money would be going to a good place. Maybe he’d finally ask Steve from accounting to dinner.

Phasma just rolled her eyes, “As much fun as you’re having, I can’t help but feel bad for them. That much pining isn’t good for anyone, we have to do something to help.”

“Shh!” Thanisson hissed out, “Hux is coming.” 

They all dispersed apart from Phasma who raked her eyes over Hux. His eyes were tired and strained, the creases around the edges deeply etched into his skin. Even his hair seemed to have lost its lustre. 

“Hey Armitage, how’s it going?” 

“Oh, fine.” Hux shrugged, “Nothing new.”

Giving a patient smile Phasma patted Hux on the shoulder, “Well a little bird told me that it’s your birthday next week, why don’t we go out this weekend to celebrate?”

“I- well, sure.” Hux shrugged, “I hadn’t planned on doing anything.” Kylo hadn’t mentioned any plans and Hux wasn’t going to wait around and hope.

“Great then, I’ll ask a few other people if they want to come too.” Phasma paused, “If that works for you of course.”

Hux simply smiled, “Phasma, you’re in charge. All I want to do is go somewhere and have a drink and forget about being thirty-four and still alone.”

“You’re not alone, you have us, and Kylo.” Phasma waved as Kylo appeared through the door, “Hey Kylo, we’re all going out for Hux’s birthday, you in?”

“Oh!” Kylo’s eyes widened, “Yeah, sounds good. Um- Hux, can I see you in your office for a minute?”

“Yes, of course.” Hux led them towards his door without even glancing back at Phasma, who crossed her arms, shaking her head.

“Hopeless.”

“So,” said Hux as his door clicked shut, “what’s up?”

Kylo’s fingers twisted in the hem of his shirt, “I just thought, for your birthday, we could maybe… go to dinner or something?”

“We go for dinner all the time,” Hux said, deliberately not meeting Kylo’s eyes. The way he’d said it sounded almost like a date and the clench that Hux’s chest had given at the thought made the blood rise to his cheeks.

“Oh, yeah, okay,” mumbled Kylo, fingers running distractedly through his hair before he inhaled, steadying himself, “At least let me get you a gift.” His breath caught in his throat, the memory of his own birthday coming unbidden to his mind. From the glassy eyed look on Hux’s face, he was thinking the same thing.

Their eyes met, a small thrill sparking up Kylo’s spine. Hux’s gaze flickered downwards, just for an instant, his tongue coming out to wet soft, pink, lips, “I’m sure you can think of something.” he breathed.

Kylo nodded, already backing towards the door, trying to swallow the hard lump that had formed in his throat. His heart was hammering, heat rushing to his face. He wasn’t sure himself whether he’d meant the dinner invitation as a date, he’d simply panicked, not wanting to share Hux with anyone else and the offer had just slipped out.

It didn’t matter, Hux hadn’t agreed anyway.

Still, Kylo reasoned as he surveyed the office, the last time there had been a work outing he’d ended up being sucked off in a toilet. Maybe this time he’d return the favour.

*****

Hux could feel the heat rising in his cheeks as Phasma passed him yet another shot. The club was dim, the dancefloor just starting to get crowded and the night was off to a good start. Kylo had turned up in a shirt that was practically painted on and Hux was finding it increasingly hard to keep his eyes off him, something that hadn’t passed Phasma by.

“Say something,” she hissed in Hux’s ear.

“What?!” Hux blinked, dragging his eyes from where Kylo was laughing at the bar with one of the accounts managers.

“You’re hurting Armitage and I really hate seeing you like this, you’re my friend.” She placed a hand on his shoulder, far gentler than her usual knee-buckling slaps, “Please, just tell Kylo how you feel. I’m pretty sure he feels the same way.”

Hux grazed his bottom lip with his teeth, “The thing is Phasma, I’m not so sure he does.” He glanced around and leaned in close, “You remember last month, when it was his mother’s funeral?” Phasma nodded, “Well we spent the night together, and Phasma-” Hux sighed deeply, “it was…” his fist clenched, remembering the way Kylo had tightened around him, the soft gasp of his name. Hux shook his head, “There aren’t words to describe how it was.” Hux grabbed another shot from the tray on the table, throwing it back and feeling the alcohol burn down his throat. “Anyway, the next morning I thought we’d talk and you know what he said?”

Phasma shook her head and Hux gave a sickly smile, “He said ‘you’re a really good friend’.” Sighing, Hux gave another longing glance towards the bar, “I guess I thought that night really meant something.”

“Oh sweetheart.” Phasma’s face softened and she leaned forward to wrap Hux in an unexpected hug. “I still think you should talk to him, he’s probably just as bad as you when it comes to feelings. And besides-” she levelled Hux with a serious look, “I don’t know about you, but I quite like being friends with the people I’m sleeping with.” Her mouth quirked up in a smile. “Just try saying something, promise me?”

“Okay,” Hux smiled, “but right now, I think we should dance.”

“An excellent plan my dear. Let’s show them that First Order Inc knows how to party.” Phasma stood, towering over Hux in her heels and offering her arm. Hux took it gladly, needing to steady himself as the shots swam straight to his head the instant he stood up.

Kylo meanwhile was watching from his spot at the bar, trying to ignore the stab of jealousy he’d felt seeing Hux hug Phasma, despite the fact he knew there was no chance of anything between them.

“Hey,” a woman with short red hair slid up to him, “having a good night?”

“Mm fine.” Kylo’s eyes were fixed on the dancefloor, watching Hux. His movements were lithe and sinuous, his hair dancing like flames where they were tossed from his forehead.

“Friend of yours?”

“Something like that,” Kylo muttered, downing his drink and signalling the bartender for another.Grabbing it he sauntered onto the dancefloor, losing himself in the music and the press of bodies around him. His head was starting to swim, the fog of alcohol coating everything in a warm shimmer that swam through his veins and made his senses blur. 

First Hux was in his arms, grinding against him, hips moving in an irresistible circle before disappearing into the crowd. Then Phasma twirled into view to flash a saucy smile before being replaced by Mitaka giggling in the arms of Steve from accounting. The whole club was starting to blur in a writhing dance of sweat and pounding beats that had Kylo’s head spinning. Red hair flashed in front of his eyes and Kylo followed, only to find himself face to face with the girl from the bar. She pulled him towards her, placing his hands on her hips as she danced. Kylo stumbled, tripping over his own feet as he tried to pull away, the girl’s hands found his shoulders, pulling him even closer and Kylo swallowed.

“I gotta,” he jerked his thumb towards the bathrooms and extracted himself from the girl’s grasp. Sweat dripped down his forehead, an unexpected bloom of nerves sending a shiver through him. Shouldering into the bathroom Kylo bent over the sink to splash cold water on his forehead. He gripped at the sink, catching his own eyes in the mirror and shook his head. Suddenly he wanted nothing more than to go home.

He pressed his way through the crowd and back towards the bar to grab a bottle of water and found Hux doing the same thing.

“Having fun?” Hux asked, watching Kylo smooth damp hair back from his forehead.

Kylo gave a small smile, “Yeah, not bad, you?”

“Pretty good,” Hux took a gulp of his water and leaned in towards Kylo, “Just don’t let Phasma give me any more shots, I think I’ve had enough for now.”

“I’ll protect you,” Kylo said, lips curving in a smile as Hux’s eyes met his.

“Listen Kylo, I-”

“Hey! You kinda left me out there.” The red haired girl shouldered between the two men, a pout on her pretty face. Her hands reached up to stroke through Kylo’s hair and he leaned away from the touch. He got the smallest glimpse of Hux’s face as he turned away, an expression of mixed bemusement and discomfort.

“Look, sorry I just-” Kylo started before the girl laughed, tossing her hair.

“It’s fine. Kiss and make up?” The girl winked.

“Um… I’m sorry, I’m not really looking for anything right now.” Kylo gently took the girl’s hands from around his neck.

“Oh!” The girl’s eyes widened, her mouth falling open, “I’m sorry, I should have realised. I kinda came on a bit strong there, didn’t I?”

“A little, yeah.” Kylo smiled, “no hard feelings though. Let me buy you a drink.”

“Oh okay, sure.”

From across the club Hux watched as Kylo smiled, signalling the bartender. The girl was laughing, her hand brushing against Kylo’s arm. Hux’s stomach clenched, the burning shots from earlier threatening to reemerge. He swallowed, throat tight, the girl was very pretty. Pinpricks of pain shot through his hands where his nails dug into the flesh of his palms. God he was pathetic, his eyes burned, pressure building inside him, the heat closing in. He needed air.

Inhaling deeply Hux headed towards the outdoor smoking area. It was a dimly lit balcony with a few sweetly scented trees of flowering jasmine that did nothing to counteract the acrid smell of tobacco. Hux wandered out, leaning on the rail of the balcony, the pounding of the music behind him starting to rebound in his head. A shiver went through him, the nights were turning cooler. And as always he had no one to share them with.

“Excuse me?” A warm voice sounded from behind Hux, “Sorry to bother, but I heard your friend inside mention you were with the First Order?”

“Yes?” Hux raised an eyebrow at the stranger, he was fairly young, his dark hair elegantly tousled as he approached with a shy smile.

“Well I hope it isn’t too presumptuous of me but I was wondering if you might need a Social Media Manager, I’m just out of school and I thought maybe…” Brilliant white teeth came out to scrape across a plush lower lip and Hux gave a small laugh.

“Well you’ve got guts, I’ll give you that.” 

The young man smiled, flipping hair out of his face, “It’s always worth a shot.”

Indoors, Kylo was searching, “Hey Thanisson, seen Hux anywhere?”

“No sorry, did you try the smoking area?”

Kylo frowned, “You think? He quit six years ago.” 

Thanisson shrugged, “You know better than I do.”

“It’s worth a try.” Kylo doubted Hux would leave without saying anything and he was sure he’d looked everywhere else. Weaving through the throng of laughing people he made his way to the balcony.

And stopped short.

Hux was smiling, his hand resting on the arm of an unreasonably pretty younger man with dark hair and pouting lips. Sloe eyes peered out from beneath long lashes and Kylo felt his stomach constrict as the stranger passed Hux a card with, presumably, his number. To make matters worse, Hux accepted it, nodding and giving another small smile.

Kylo stood frozen, suddenly feeling all too big and clumsy compared to the man now staring at Hux with adoration in his eyes. He couldn’t breathe, it was as if a steel band had been clamped around his chest. He needed to move, to do something other than stand and watch, all too conspicuous. 

“Okay, so give me a call.” the stranger said and turned away, heading towards Kylo. As he passed Kylo caught the hint of pink on his cheeks and watched him glance back at Hux who had turned to stare off the balcony.

Heat rose in Kylo’s face, blood rushing through him, making his stomach churn and nerves tingle. He was torn between running away, pretending he hadn’t seen a thing and pulling Hux into his arms to crush their lips together in a possessive kiss. He did neither.

Instead Hux spotted him and waved him over. His eyes were slightly glassy, his movements languid and his cheeks slightly flushed. Kylo felt his chest flutter, his mind racing.

_don’t ask don’t ask don’t ask_

“Who was he?” Kylo’s voice was rough, accusatory and Hux felt a small shiver run through him, surely he wasn’t jealous? He’d had that girl all over him all night.

“No one.” Hux said, “Anyway, who was she?” He jerked his head towards the door, eyebrows quirked.

“No one.”

“Well then, fine.”

“Okay.”

“Okay.”

And then Kylo’s hand was on his shoulder, fingers brushing down his arm, rough even through the fabric of his shirt. Dark hair tickled at his cheek as Kylo leaned down, breath hot in his ear, “Wanna go home and fuck?”

Hux felt his body respond, even through the mild fog of alcohol and exhaled, “Oh god yes.”

They barely spoke on the taxi ride to Hux’s apartment, the tension palpable in the air. It wasn’t until the door slammed shut they they moved. Kylo pressed himself into the length of Hux’s back, lips descending on his throat as he fumbled with the buttons of Hux’s shirt. Gasping, Hux arched into the touch, reaching over his shoulder to anchor his fingers into Kylo’s hair. He hissed out when he felt Kylo’s teeth sink into the meat of his shoulder and turned, intent on marking him just as much.

Hux stripped Kylo’s shirt in a single motion and dipped his head to tongue at one pink nipple, smiling at the groan that slipped out. His fingers scraped down Kylo’s sides, leaving little red lines in their path and had Kylo squeezing tight on his shoulders.

“Ah, Hux, wanna fuck you so bad.”

Running his tongue up the length of Kylo’s body, Hux just moaned in response and fastened his lips to Kylo’s collarbone, sucking and biting, hands reaching to undo his own trousers. He let them drop, cock already hard and hot in the cool night air. Kylo followed suit, stripping himself and practically falling over his own jeans as he followed Hux to the bedroom.

As Hux bent to fish through his bedside drawer he felt Kylo’s hands on his hips and the hot press of his cock at the base of his spine. He passed Kylo the bottle of lube and crawled onto the bed on all fours. 

“Condom?” asked Kylo and Hux turned, lip caught between his teeth.

“If you’d prefer,” his eyes flickered to Kylo’s face, “but I’m quite happy without.”

“Oh,” Kylo swallowed thickly, this was new. His cock gave a twitch in his hand at the thought of spilling inside Hux, how he would feel clenching around him, the look on Hux’s face when he felt Kylo come in him. He felt his breath speed up, he definitely wanted that. 

Pouring the lube into one hand Kylo paused. 

“Um… actually, Hux? Could we, could you maybe-” He frowned, hating his complete lack of articulation, “I want to see your face.”

“Oh,” Hux breathed, this was new. Turning over he looked up, meeting Kylo’s eyes and felt his breath catch. “Yes, I’d like that.”

Kylo crawled up the bed towards him, lubed hand sliding between his parted legs to coax and tease at his hole. He radiated heat and Hux arched upwards, nipping at Kylo’s collarbone once more. “Come on,” he said, driving himself onto Kylo’s fingers, “you know I can take it.” He lay back, fingers stroking across his cock and upwards to pinch at the coral peak of one nipple. “Give it to me Kylo.”

“Ah! Hux.” Kylo slicked himself, pausing for a second to admire the way Hux’s hole twitched, wet and pink and waiting. He nudged the head of his cock inside, feeling a thrill of triumph at the little moan Hux let out.

_Mine._

Leaning forward Kylo sank slowly into the heat of Hux’s body, never taking his eyes from his face. Hux’s lips were parted, panting, sweat just starting to bead on his forehead. Shifting, Hux wrapped his legs about Kylo’s hips, pulling him infinitesimally closer, deeper.

Kylo felt his eyes slip shut and groaned as he was buried to the hilt. One hand gripped tight on Hux’s ass hard enough to bruise while he propped himself up with the other.

Hux’s hands stroked up his face, smoothing his hair back with a gentleness that made Kylo’s heart flutter. He opened his eyes to stare directly into the green of Hux’s own, watching the flicker of golden eyelashes as he slowly started to thrust. He brushed his lips across Hux’s throat, feeling the scrape of stubble across the soft skin. Pressing kisses across Hux’s jawline Kylo didn’t dare go any higher, focusing instead on darkening the mark he’d left in the hollow of Hux’s throat.

Hux’s voice groaned out beneath his tongue. “You really want to make a mark don’t you?”

Kylo answered with a growl and a sharp thrust of his hips.

_Mine._

“I saw that guy give you his number.” Kylo’s voice was low, dangerous, his movements speeding, “Are you gonna call him?”

Hux’s eyes widened but still he rose to meet every thrust, “You’re ah- actually asking me this? Right here, ah! While you’re inside me? You utter gobshite Kylo Ren.” Clenching tight around Kylo he was rewarded with a hiss of breath and a strangled moan. Hux wrapped his arms about Kylo’s neck, his back arching to trap his cock between their stomachs. “And for your information, no. Not my type.”

Kylo’s hand cupped Hux’s face as he brought their foreheads together, their breaths mingling, hot and sweet, “Oh yes? What _is_ your type then Hux?”

A flash of terror washed through Hux and he pushed upwards at Kylo’s shoulder, managing to disbalance him and roll them both over. He circled his hips, bouncing, impaling himself on the hard length of Kylo’s cock. “Wouldn’t. You. Like. To- ah! Know?” he panted, each word punctuated with another grind downwards.

“Hux! Oh god!” Kylo gripped tight on Hux’s hips. Hux’s hands were on his shoulders, bracing him as he pistoned his hips downwards. They moved together, the hard press of Hux’s cock trapped between them. Kylo’s eyes were fixed on Hux, unable to look away from the expressions of sheer pleasure that crossed his face with every thrust. His hair fell across his face, bouncing with Hux’s movements, dancing like a flame in the dim room. Kylo’s heart clenched, even as he felt his balls begin to tighten, he’d never seen anything as beautiful.

Hux panted, dragging his cock across the hard planes of Kylo’s abs. His mouth was open and panting, his eyes were blown almost black, and Hux wanted nothing more than to drown in them. Kylo’s fingers were pressed tight on his thigh as he arched off the bed, meeting every one of Hux’s movements. Hux moaned, knowing it would only take a few more thrusts.

“Kylo, I’m close!”

“Y-yea-ah! Me too.”

Hux worked his hips, feeling Kylo stiffen inside him, his own cock sliding between their sweat slick bodies. “Ah yes, yes yes yes _yessssss_.” He felt the heat of Kylo’s release inside him and threw his head back, his come spurting across Kylo’s stomach and chest.

Thighs trembling, Hux relaxed, settling on Kylo’s lap. His chest heaved, little aftershocks of pleasure washing over him. He gazed down, taking in Kylo’s mussed hair, flushed face and sweaty, come covered chest and felt a sense of deep satisfaction.

_Mine._

“Wow.” Kylo blinked at the ceiling, “That was…” he winced a little as Hux raised off him, his softened cock slipping out. He needed to wash but couldn’t bring himself to move as Hux flopped next to him, face buried into the pillow with a little ‘ _Mmm_ ’ of satisfaction. Kylo reached over to stroke at Hux’s hair and stopped himself, “Um, is it okay for me to stay?” 

“Yes.” Hux said simply, not wanting to add the unspoken _please, stay with me always_. He shifted, feeling the delicious slick in his ass, the slight stickiness between his thighs and breathed deep. What he wouldn’t give to have Kylo here every night. Tiredness washed over him, the sound of Kylo’s breathing a soothing rhythm in his ears.

“Alright, I need to get clean,” Kylo said, stretching out and Hux nodded, already snuggling under the duvet. By the time Kylo got back he was fast asleep. Kylo smiled softly, slipping under the covers and tentatively placing a hand on Hux’s shoulder.

“Goodnight,” he murmured, gazing at Hux’s face. Pale eyelashes fluttered slightly like a guttering flame and Kylo’s breath caught in his throat, transfixed by cheekbones sharp enough to cut through the moonlight that lay across them. It would be so easy to bend down, to brush their lips together but Kylo stopped himself.

If they ever did kiss then he wanted them both to be an active part of it. He wanted them both to want it.

If they ever did kiss then Kylo wanted it to be real.

It was either that, or nothing.


	10. November

November brought with it a cold snap and a viciously virulent strain of flu that cleared the First Order offices of all but a few personnel. Among those left were Hux, who didn’t _get_ sick, thank you very much, Kylo, who spent most of his time wrapped in a giant black scarf, and Snoke, who was quite possibly already undead.

The morning after Hux’s birthday had been awkward, both Kylo and Hux overly stiff and formal. They had thankfully been saved by a call from Poe, who needed Kylo’s help in rescuing an abandoned corgi from an old swimming pool. As he’d run out the door that morning, Kylo had never been more thankful of his rebellious teenage years and the fact that he still remembered how to pick locks.

Now though, he was glad to be in the office. Despite their building regulations, Poe had insisted on bringing the dog back to their apartment and now Kylo was faced every morning with an overly excitable ball of fuzz that insisted on waking him far earlier than necessary. Poe and Finn treated her like a new child and while Kylo found her cute he couldn’t imagine ever getting that way over a pet. He suspected he might be allergic too, his nose was completely blocked and his throat was starting to feel like it had been rubbed down with sandpaper. Bundling his scarf further about his face Kylo made a note to himself to go to the doctor’s later.

Hux meanwhile was doing the jobs of at least half the staff, he’d been working late and coming in early for the past two weeks and the only thing that had stopped him from sleeping at his desk was Kylo physically dragging him out and insisting he go home.

Today though, his mind was wandering, lost in imaginings of what might happen if he were to sit himself on Kylo’s desk, unwind the scarf from his face, and kiss him right there and then. As he watched, Kylo sneezed, his shoulders drooping, a look of misery passing across his face for an instant.

Marching over Hux slammed his palm onto Kylo’s desk, making him jerk in surprise. What little of Kylo’s face he could see above the scarf was ashen, his eyes glassy. “Go home Kylo,” Hux ordered. “You’re getting sick.”

“No I’m not,” Kylo’s voice was muffled through his scarf, “And I can’t go home, I’m allergic to Poe’s dog.”

“You’re not allergic, you’re ill, now go home,” Hux raised his eyebrows, “or at least go to a doctor.”

Kylo crossed his arms, brows creasing, “Fine. But you have to promise me that you’ll finish at a reasonable time, it’s Friday, you’re _not_ staying here all weekend. I’ll drag you out again if I have to.”

Hux felt a swooping in his stomach at the thought of Kylo’s arms around him and heat quickly rose to his face, “That won’t be necessary, you’ll be at home, taking care of yourself.”

“Okay, but I’m calling you at six-thirty to make sure you’re not here.” Kylo rose shakily, his muscles protesting with every movement. Maybe Hux had a point, he doubted his allergies were the cause of the pounding headache just starting to make itself known behind his eyes.

Hux’s eyes followed Kylo out of the office, warmth pooling in his chest. He hoped Kylo would be all right, he couldn’t stand to see him feeling bad. Returning to his office he smiled, he’d stop by the market on the way home and get some ingredients for soup, then tomorrow he’d bring some to Kylo, hopefully it would help.

When he returned home that evening the apartment was as dark and unwelcoming as ever and Hux sighed, shifting grocery bags as he searched for his keys. Listening to Kylo talk about Poe’s dog had planted a seed in his mind. It might be nice to have something to come home to, and his building _did_ allow pets, maybe it was time to get a companion.

Hux headed straight to the kitchen, not bothering to turn on the lights. He was just setting his bags on the counter when there was a soft groaning noise from the direction of the couch.

“Oh, seriously?” Flipping on the light revealed a pile of blankets and a tousled head of dark hair almost buried beneath them. “Kylo? Why are you here?”

“‘m sick,” Kylo’s voice was muffled and hoarse and Hux rolled his eyes.

“Yes, that’s why I told you to go home.”

“Doctor said I shouldn’t be left alone, and there wasn’t anyone there. Poe’s staying with Finn again.” Kylo pouted and Hux noticed the pink tinge to his cheeks. Fever was starting to set in. Mentally Hux rummaged through his medicine cabinet; painkillers, vitamin tablets, decongestants, pretty much everything he needed, and he’d just been to the market so that worked out well.

“Fine,” sighed Hux, “I guess I’ll have to take care of you for a little while.”

Kylo smiled, eyes glassy, “Yes please.”

“I’d planned on making some soup for you anyway, what would you prefer; chicken noodle or tomato and red pepper?”

“All your cooking is nice Hux,” Kylo sank further into the couch, leaving just his nose and eyes visible and Hux felt warmth bloom through him. He was glad that Kylo was here, at least Hux could make sure he was okay. 

“I know my cooking is nice, but what would you _prefer_?”

“Chicken noodle please.” Kylo stretched out under his blankets and Hux smiled softly before returning to the kitchen.

Despite the pounding in his head and the ache in his muscles Kylo was happy. If he was being honest with himself, Hux’s apartment felt more like home than his own these days. He pulled another blanket over himself and closed his eyes, letting the aroma of Hux’s cooking come to him through his one working nostril.

Before he realised it there was a hand on his shoulder and Hux’s voice, low and soothing, “Kylo? Your soup is ready.”

“Mmm,” Kylo blinked his eyes open and extracted his hands from within the twists of blanket to accept the bowl.

“Oh good,” said Hux, “I was worried I’d have to feed you.”

“I’m not that pathetic,” Kylo blew lightly on his first spoonful, “Ow!” Hux raised an eyebrow at him. “What? It’s just hot. Tasty though.”

“Good, now when you’ve finished that you can drink some orange juice.” Hux’s cheeks flushed, “If you want to, of course. I don’t want to sound like your mother or anything.”

“Hah! My mom never made anything this good.” A shadow passed across Kylo’s eyes and he gave a soft smile, “She did make a good apple pie though, I’ll make it for you some day.”

“That would be nice.” Hux settled back on the couch with his own bowl of soup. Kylo shifted slightly to give him room and Hux pulled one of the blankets over his own lap. “Shall we watch a movie?”

“Yeah, let’s do that.” Kylo smiled, this was the type of easy contentment that he craved. He’d seen Poe and Finn so many times, just curled up together, not needing to talk, happy just being together.

If only every day could be like this.

When Kylo’s eyes started drooping Hux was quick to offer Kylo the bed, Kylo was too weak to put up more than a cursory resistance, but he still tried.

“No Hux, I don’t want to steal your bed, you’ve done enough already.” Kylo lurched to his feet, already heading for the bedroom and Hux felt a flutter of fondness.

“It’s fine, just leave me a few blankets.” Hux stretched, running his fingers through his hair.

“Okay, but thanks, I’m glad I came here.” Kylo’s eyebrows creased, “I just hope you don’t catch it from me.”

“Please,” Hux scoffed, “I don’t _get_ sick.”

The next morning, Hux was sick.

He awoke with burning eyes, trembling limbs and a stomach that tossed and turned as much as he had the night before. Too many times he’d considered getting up and wandering through to his room, maybe slipping under the covers to hold Kylo in his arms. Every time he had stopped himself, not wanting to disturb Kylo, not wanting to break the tentative peace between them.

Hux groaned. There was no way he could stay on the couch in this state. He hauled himself to his feet and shuffled towards the bedroom. To his surprise Kylo was already awake, or at least partially so. “Hux? Was the couch that bad?”

“Mmph,” Hux mumbled and flopped onto the bed, “This is your fault.”

“M’sorry.” Kylo slid up to make room, “You wanna sleep some more?”

Hux answered by pulling a pillow over his head and rolling over. Kylo just smiled and buried himself back into the comfort of the bed.

It wasn’t long before Hux’s arms found their way around Kylo. His body was wracked with shivers and a cold sweat that drenched him. Kylo on the other hand was a furnace. His skin was on fire, soothed only at the points where Hux’s clammy hands pressed against him. Hux pressed desperately into the warmth and Kylo pressed back. All awkwardness was forgotten, all that mattered was trying to balance the burning heat and the freezing chill.

“Can you move?” Kylo rasped out. “I need water.”

Hux shook his head, not caring that he was pressed to Kylo’s chest, his hair sticking to his forehead in damp spikes. “It hurts to blink.”

Kylo pressed his face against Hux’s hair, squeezing tight with one hand. “Maybe we should move to the couch, it’s easier to get stuff.”

“Yeah, okay.” Hux shifted his stiff limbs, leaning against Kylo as they both rose shakily from the bed. “You get the stuff from the medicine cabinet. I’ll make some tea.”

After far longer than it would have usually taken, they made it to the couch. Kylo dumped a concoction of pills onto the table while Hux continued the slow walk to the kitchen. Kylo followed, “Let me help, I’ll heat up some of the soup.”

“Mmm,” Hux nodded, blinking slowly. He had no idea what time of day it was and he didn’t care, all that mattered was getting some sort of sustenance into his body and collapsing onto the couch. His thought process moved at the same speed as the honey he was spooning into the tea while beside him Kylo hacked into a loaf of bread as if it had somehow angered him.

Eventually though they were ensconced on the couch, the scent of lemon and ginger tea mingling with the smell of soup, the delicious aroma completely unappreciated by Kylo and Hux who were both sniffling into tissues. Kylo pulled a pile of blankets over them both and began shovelling bread and soup into his mouth. Hux on the other hand had little appetite and was content to sip his tea in silence.

“Do you wanna watch something?” Kylo leaned heavily against the couch cushions, remote in his hand.

“Mm, sure.” Hux was eyeing his first spoonful of soup, hoping he could keep it down. “I don’t want to think too hard though.”

Kylo nodded, “Documentary? Attenborough is always soothing.”

“That sounds good, there’s a new Planet Earth series.” said Hux around a mouthful of noodles.

“Perfect.” Kylo said as he curled himself completely onto the couch. His skin was prickling with goosebumps and he huddled into the cushions. “Is the heat on?”

“Yep, and I’m still freezing.” Hux’s cheeks were lit with a pink glow that made his freckles disappear, his forehead was beaded with sweat and all Kylo could think of was pressing a kiss to the flushed skin.

“Alright, come here then.” Kylo lifted his arm in invitation, willing his stomach to stop fluttering as Hux practically moulded himself to his side, his head coming to rest on Kylo’s chest. Kylo wrapped his arm around Hux’s shoulder, feeling the way slim fingers gripped tight on his waist.

 _Poor thing_ , Kylo thought, _he must really be ill. He’s holding on so tight_.

Hux simply pulled himself closer, the only thing going through his mind was a mantra of _warm warm warm soft strong warm_. He could vaguely feel Kylo’s hand rubbing circles on his shoulder and nuzzled into his chest. “This is nice. Warm.”

Kylo leaned down, the silken strands of Hux’s hair tickling against his chin, “Yeah, warm.” He could feel the rhythm of Hux’s breathing against him, soothing the pain in his head and sending him into a light doze.

He awoke with his body burning. 

Hissing in a breath Kylo took his arm from around Hux’s shoulders, jolting him awake. Pain lanced through him, making his stomach roil. “Hux, I’m gonna throw up.”

“Okay, okay.” Hux scrambled from beneath the blankets and towards the kitchen. He managed to grab the basin from the sink and thrust it into Kylo’s arms before the soup made its reappearance.

Kylo’s stomach heaved and Hux winced at the sound of its contents hitting the bottom of the basin. Tears were streaming from Kylo’s eyes and Hux felt a pang of pity. He squeezed gently at Kylo’s knee, smoothing the hair back from his forehead with his other hand. “Shh, just get it up, you’ll feel better.”

Tears and mucus ran from Kylo’s eyes and nose, embarrassment making him feel even worse. “M’sorry Hux.” A cool hand stroked across his forehead before bringing a tissue to dab at his clammy face.

“Don’t apologise, you’re sick.”

“Well so are you,” Kylo’s hands trembled where he held the basin, “you should be taking care of yourself, not me.”

Hux let out a scoff of derision that turned into a hacking coughing fit and Kylo slid the remainder of his now cold tea over. Hux gulped it down gratefully and turned back to Kylo. His eyes were ringed with purple, exhaustion radiating from his every movement, “We’ll take care of each other, okay?”

Kylo nodded and winced at the ache the small movement caused in his neck. He wobbled slightly as he rose, taking the basin to the bathroom to clean it out. His limbs protested with every movement, stiff and sore, soothed only where the warm water washed over his hands.

“Hux, I’m gonna run a bath.” Kylo said, wondering if his weak voice would carry. He’d already sweated through his clothes and hadn’t thought to bring a change, “And I’m gonna wash my stuff.” He spotted Hux’s green bathrobe hanging on the door and slipped into it, relishing the sensation of the fuzzy material against his skin. Padding back to the living room with his t-shirt and sweatpants in hand, Kylo found Hux face down on a pillow, his own shirt ruched up above his waist.

“Ugh, I can’t stop sweating, it’s disgusting. I’ll get in once you’re done.” Hux’s face was lined as he grabbed some painkillers from a packet and swallowed them dry. Kylo shrugged.

“We can always share. You have a big tub, and you’re pretty skinny. Saves having to get up and run another one.”

Kylo saw Hux’s head tilt as he considered the suggestion. “Okay, why not. It’s not like you haven’t seen me naked before.” He swallowed, a flash of pain passing across his face. “Just promise if I fall asleep in the tub, you won’t let me drown.”

“As long as you do the same.” 

“Deal,” said Hux, and stripped off his shirt.

Hux’s bath really was far bigger than he needed, bigger than anyone needed really. He rarely used it, preferring the shower, but today he was grateful. Kylo had filled the tub with sweet scented bubbles that Hux usually only saved for when he was extremely stressed.

Kylo sank into the water with a sigh and pulled his knees up to his chest to allow Hux room. Their legs tangled together somewhat awkwardly but Kylo didn’t mind, the contented look on Hux’s face was enough to make up for it. He curled his toes as Hux ran a sponge up his leg, an odd half moan falling from his lips.

Hux scrubbed at the back of his neck, soaping under his arms, it was bad enough feeling ill, he didn’t need to smell terrible as well. Kylo meanwhile was slicking back his hair, running his fingers through it in an attempt to loosen the knots. Hux couldn’t help but smile, getting sick was horrible, but if it meant getting to see Kylo like this, it wasn’t all bad.

“So,” Kylo started, “I’ll order us some food for tonight I think, no need expending energy we don’t have.” He leaned against the rim of the bath and breathed deep, the steam starting to clear his sinuses. “Then I’ll head back to my place after.”

Hux nudged him with one foot, “No you won’t. Not until you’re well again,” he blinked slowly, trying to clear the spots dancing in front of his eyes, “And I don’t like the thought of you going back to an empty apartment, you don’t know if Poe will be there.”

“Yeah well, I’m gonna have to get used to it,” sighed Kylo, “I didn’t tell you. Poe’s planning on moving in with Finn in the new year.” He raised his eyebrows, “I doubt I’ll find another roommate who’ll put up with me.”

“Nonsense,” Hux waved a hand, accidentally splashing water onto the floor, “You’re perfectly lovely.”

Kylo flushed, knowing it was just the fever talking, “Thanks, but I think I’ll just have to get used to it.”

Hux shook his head, voice thick as he spoke. “You won’t,” his eyes were puffy, rimmed with red, “you don’t. You come home to nothing. You go to bed with nothing.” Hux’s eyes burned into Kylo’s like shards of green glass, “You wake up with _nothing_. It’s awful Kylo. Don’t live alone.”

Hux’s head was cloudy, the sensation of Kylo’s hand on his knee barely registering through the wave of dizziness that swept through him. “I’m sorry Hux, I didn’t realise you felt that way.”

Hux just smiled, his head starting to droop, “Gonna get a cat, -like cats, you like cats?”

“Yeah Hux,” Kylo smiled, “I like cats. And I think it’s time for you to get out, you’re starting to sound a little funny.”

“Okay.” Hux nodded, his head filled with cotton, all senses dulled. “I promise I can dress myself.”

“That’s fine. I’ll just stick with your robe for now, that okay?” Kylo helped Hux out of the tub and wrapped him in a fluffy white towel.

Hux leaned against Kylo’s chest, holding tight to one arm, “Keep it, it suits you.”

“Well I’ll keep it while my stuff is in the machine.” Kylo could feel heat rising to his face as he shrugged the robe on, returning to the couch to rearrange the blankets and clear a space next to him for Hux. His own head was pounding and he rustled through the pile of medication on the table to find himself some painkillers. Hux appeared in fresh pyjamas and immediately flopped down next to him. His head came to rest on Kylo’s shoulder and he slid down to lie the length of the couch. Kylo followed suit.

He hesitated just a moment before wrapping his arms around Hux and lay down too. “I’m gonna take a nap, you wanna do the same?”

Hux nodded against his chest and yawned. “You make such a good pillow.”

Kylo felt his eyes start to droop, “I wish we could always do this.” he mumbled, his senses dulled and sluggish.

“You should move in here, stay with me.” Hux replied, “Then we could.”

Maybe it was the combination of fever and tiredness, or the strength of the medication, but a few hours later, when they both woke up, neither remembered a thing.


	11. December

“Oh come on! It’s Christmas,” Unamo’s voice was almost aggressively cheerful. “It’s tradition!” 

Before her Hux stood, fists clenched and face stony. A nerve twitched in his forehead as he glared at Unamo, who beamed at him, unflinching.

It was the last day before the holidays began and some bright spark had thought it amusing to stick a sprig of mistletoe in the hallway outside the office. So far Hux had managed to avoid everyone, but now he was face to face with the one person he most wanted to kiss but couldn’t.

Kylo was, to Hux’s eyes, visibly uncomfortable, and the fact that most of the office staff seemed to be watching was not helping the matter. Hux wanted to haul him away, press kisses to his face in private and tell him that they didn’t need the mistletoe at all. Instead he glared at everyone assembled and snapped, “You’re all ridiculous.”

He darted forward and pressed a quick kiss to Kylo’s cheek, trying not to linger too long or breathe too deeply. The scent of Kylo’s hair was almost overwhelming and Hux had visions of himself pressing his face into the thick waves.

“Merry Christmas Kylo,” he mumbled and turned back to the crowd. “Right, now can we _please_ get back to work. I know it’s the last day today, but we will be closed until the new year and Snoke wants things done.” 

Voices murmured around him and Hux could feel a nerve starting to pulse in his forehead before another voice echoed through the hallway.

“You heard the man, get back to work!” Phasma clapped her hands, shooing everyone back to their respective departments, “Anyone who doesn’t is officially un-invited from my New Year’s Eve party.”

That threat sent the crowd scuttling and Phasma beamed as she turned to Hux and Kylo. “So what are your plans over the holidays?”

Kylo shrugged, “Going to my dad’s tomorrow, gonna stay there a few days and be back around Wednesday. Y’know, if I don’t murder the old man before then.”

Hux raised his eyebrows, knowing full well how tumultuous Kylo’s relationship with his father was. He turned to Phasma with a small smile, “I, on the other hand, have no plans. Which suits me just fine. Besides,” he nudged Phasma, “I’ll probably need the rest to prepare for your party.”

“Oh yeah, you get to relax.” Kylo said, “I get to help Poe start packing.”

“They found a place then? That was quick.” Something tickled in the back of Hux’s mind, a flash of memory that was gone as fast as it had appeared. 

“Yeah, they move in on the seventh of January. I’m gonna give it a couple of weeks after that to see how things are, then maybe I’ll advertise for a roommate.” Kylo shrugged and Hux felt a rushing in his ears, the sensation of warmth and comfort and the memory of his own voice.

_You should move in here, stay with me._

Oh god, Hux hoped that Kylo had forgotten he’d said that. He’d been ill, not making any sense, he didn’t mean it.

The vision of Kylo greeting him at the door floated into his mind, maybe pulling him into a kiss and holding him tight, one hand stroking his hair.

Okay maybe he _did_ mean it, but there was no chance of it actually happening. Hux didn’t deserve something as nice, he was weak and pathetic, as useless as his father had always claimed. He breathed deep, determined not to let his own failings ruin the last day of work.

“Well come over to my place before you leave, I’ve got a present for you.” Hux said, pointedly ignoring the arch of Phasma’s eyebrows.

“Yeah sure, I’ll come by later tonight, gotta pick your gift up first.” Kylo turned with a wave, stopping only to tear the mistletoe from the ceiling. His stomach twisted in knots, the spot where Hux’s lips had touched his cheek a burning brand on his skin. It was too much, too close to what he knew he couldn’t have.

The muddle in his mind lasted all day, tearing him from one decision to another. He would tell Hux, he wouldn’t tell him, he’d kiss him, he’d leave it, he’d bring the mistletoe. Kylo bit at his lower lip, tasting blood. He frowned and ran a hand through his hair as he reached Hux’s apartment, no closer to deciding than he had been that afternoon.

Hux was in the middle of washing dishes when he heard the door open and felt a jolt go through him. There was something he really loved about Kylo having his own key. It may have started as an annoyance but now Hux couldn’t imagine things any other way. Something about the familiarity comforted him, if nothing else, they had that. The sound of Kylo’s voice echoed through the hall.

“Hey, I’m here. Do me a favour and go sit on the couch.”

Hux frowned to himself, “O- Kay?” He wiped down his hands and wandered into the living room wondering what Kylo could possibly be planning. He sat on the couch and shouted in the direction of the hallway, “What now?”

“Okay just close your eyes and wait, I’m coming in.”

Hux’s mind raced with possibilities, maybe Kylo was wearing something to surprise him, maybe he wasn’t wearing anything. The sound of footsteps came closer and a shiver of anticipation ran through Hux. The creak of the floorboards meant that Kylo was right in front of him, maybe even bending down towards him. Inhaling softly Hux wet his lips with his tongue picturing Kylo’s face inches from his own.

The imagined kiss never came. Instead Hux found his lap occupied by something warm and fuzzy and undoubtedly alive. He blinked his eyes open to find a matching pair of lamplike green staring back at him. “Oh,” Hux said, mouth falling open as the ginger cat circled a few times before stretching and digging its claws into his knee. Hissing in a breath Hux looked to Kylo, an amazed half smile on his face, “You got me a cat.”

“Actually,” said Kylo, “you got you a cat. You rescued her a few months ago, remember? I went to the shelter when Poe was getting Beebee chipped and the lady behind the desk recognised me and mentioned she was still there. They’ve been calling her Millicent.” He made a face. “But you can change that of course. I have a cat box and stuff for her in the hall.”

Hux stroked idly between the cat’s ears and she flopped over to expose her belly. “I don’t know what to say. Kylo this is…” Hux’s breath caught in his throat as their eyes met, he stretched a hand out to squeeze Kylo’s knee. “Thank you.”

Kylo smiled, scratching Millicent under the chin, “Well you did say you wanted company.” The look on Hux’s face was everything he had hoped it would be and his heart swelled in his chest, part of him wished they could spend Christmas together after all.

“She’s perfect.” Hux couldn’t tear his eyes away from Kylo’s face, choosing instead to hug Millicent to him. A deep purr rumbled through his body, soothing him. “I feel like my gift can’t quite match up.” He gently lifted Millicent from his lap to retrieve the meticulously wrapped parcel from his room.

Kylo waited, Millie’s purrs filling the room as he petted her. It had been a bit of a risk getting Hux a cat, especially since they weren’t actually together. They should be though, Kylo thought. This had gone on too long, he needed to say something. Hux returned, a look of concern on his face.

“This really isn’t good enough.” He handed the present to Kylo and sat back down, Millicent immediately returning to his lap and flopping down, claiming her spot.

“Oh don’t be stupid,” Kylo said as he tore into the paper to reveal his present. He blinked, chest suddenly tight. It was a picture, a portrait really, of himself and his mother, smiling.

“Hux, how did you?” Kylo could feel tears starting to rise in his eyes.

“I… might have asked your dad for a picture, there’s a woman downtown who paints these. I thought-”

Hux’s words were cut off as Kylo threw his arms around him, burying his head into Hux’s shoulder. “I love-” his fingers clenched on Hux’s shoulder, “I love it.”

Hux patted at the back of Kylo’s head, trying to resist the urge to wind his fingers through the dark waves of his hair, “I’m glad.” He breathed deep, this was the moment he’d been waiting for. It was time to clear the air. “Kylo, firstly I wanted to apologise for this afternoon. I know you weren’t comfortable with the mistletoe thing and I’m really sorry it happened.”

_Of course he’s sorry, he doesn’t want to kiss you, why would he want that, you’re an idiot for thinking he might be interested._

Kylo pulled back face closed off. “It’s fine, not your fault, I know you were just trying to get everyone off our backs, let’s just forget it happened okay?”

Hux closed his mouth and turned away, “Oh. Yes. Okay.”

_See. He wants to forget. He doesn’t want you._

Kylo stood, “I should get going, I leave pretty early tomorrow. I’ll see you at Phasma’s party?”

“Of course. Have a good time.”

“I’ll try,” Kylo walked to the door and Hux followed. Both of their minds were in turmoil. 

As Hux opened the door, Kylo spun, pressing a single kiss to Hux’s cheek. “Merry Christmas Hux.” He slammed the door behind him, leaving Hux dazed.

He returned to the couch and sank down with a sigh. A ginger paw batted him on the arm and Hux turned to his new roommate, “Millie, I’m so confused.”

Meanwhile, Kylo ran.

*****

Christmas at his father’s turned out to be better than expected, although the shadow of his mother’s passing cast a pall over things. There were no major fights and Kylo suspected that Han was trying especially hard in Leia’s memory and sought to do the same. Things were eased slightly by the presence of his Uncle Luke, who despite his grief, seemed to have reached an almost zen-like state of calm that practically emanated from his body.

The night before Kylo returned to the city Luke found him sitting on the porch, staring at the stars, lost in thought. “You okay there?” he asked, “Your dad wanted me to check on you, we couldn’t help but notice you’ve been pretty down.” He tilted his head, “Well, more so than usual.”

“It’s nothing.” said Kylo, already dreading seeing Hux again but at the same time, desperately wanting.

“I’m surprised your um… redhead guy-friend? Boyfriend? Didn’t come with you.”

Kylo winced, “He’s just a friend, it’s all he’ll ever be.”

“Have you talked about it?” Luke’s smile was patient and kind. “Because I know what you’re like. People start talking and as soon as you hear something you don’t like you shut down.”

Kylo didn’t say anything, simply twisted his fingers in the hem of his shirt. Luke placed a hand on his shoulder, “You’re scared.” Kylo opened his mouth to argue and was stopped by a prosthetic finger held in the air, “No, don’t argue. You’re scared, so you run away. I did the same thing once, and I regretted it.” He let out a heavy sigh, “Listen to me Be- Kylo, you can’t be scared of your feelings or you’ll never know what happens if you let them out.” He gave Kylo’s shoulder a gentle squeeze and rose, stretching, “I’m gonna go see how your dad is. Just, do me a favour and talk to your friend, for your own sake.”

Kylo nodded. His uncle was right, he’d never know how things might turn out if he didn’t try. “I will, thanks.” There were a few days left before Phasma’s party. He could figure it out before then.

*****

“I’m going to be late!” Hux’s voice was harried as he shrugged his coat on and glared accusingly at Millicent. It was her fault really, they had been sitting on the couch and she had been so warm and comfortable on his chest, he couldn’t help but fall asleep. Now it was almost eleven and he should have been at Phasma’s hours ago. He scrambled for his keys and rushed out. As long as he could make it by midnight then things would be fine.

Phasma’s party was being held on the rooftop of her apartment building and Kylo barely recognised anyone in the crowd, he craned his neck, searching for the telltale spark of Hux’s hair. 

An arm was thrown about his neck and he was whirled around to face Unamo, “Kylo!” She kissed him on the cheek, “Good Christmas?”

“Pretty good,” said Kylo, watching as she snagged a couple of glasses of champagne from a passing tray and handed him one, “how was your Hanukkah?”

“Oh can’t complain,” Unamo handed Kylo a glass, “some party isn’t it? I think half Phasma’s building invited their friends here, I’ve barely seen anyone.”

“Yeah, same. I think Phasma’s by the bar and I’m sure I saw MItaka somewhere.” Kylo took a sip of champagne and glanced around again.

“Oh good! I need to settle something with Mitaka actually,” Unamo’s lips curved in a sly smile. “Is Hux here with you?”

Kylo frowned, “I’ve not seen him since the last day of work, he did say he was coming though.”

“You’ve been together a while now, haven’t you?” Unamo raised an eyebrow in a delicate arch while Kylo inhaled his champagne and coughed.

“I… We’re not together.”

“Oh, okay.” Kylo could have sworn she sounded disappointed. “Well I’ll send him your way if I see him. Gonna go find Mitaka now, have a good night.” And with that, she disappeared into the crowd, leaving Kylo both confused and slightly irritated. Everyone seemed to think they were already together, were his feelings that obvious?

Although, he pondered, that implied that everyone thought the feelings were mutual. Butterflies fluttered through Kylo’s stomach, for the first time he dared to consider, maybe they could be. He needed to speak to Hux.

Hux was panting as he jabbed at the button for the elevator, he was cutting it close but he had successfully made it to the party before midnight. He dashed onto the roof and slid to a halt. He’d expected some people from the office, maybe one or two from the building, but not an entire crowd crammed onto one brightly lit roof. Snagging a glass he downed it in a single gulp before spotting Phasma leaning against the roof edge.

“Armitage, you made it!” Phasma wrapped him in a tight hug, “Happy almost-New Year!” She took a swig from one large bottle and giggled as the bubbles spilled over, “Champagne?”

“I’m alright thanks, I just had a glass.” Hux’s eyes automatically roved over the crowd, searching for the telltale sweep of dark hair. Phasma followed his gaze and grabbed Hux by the chin, gently turning his head she pointed towards a slightly shadowed nook.

“Kylo’s over there talking to Mitaka. You’d better catch up with him quick, it’s not long til midnight.”

“Ah, thanks Phasma, thanks.” Hux hesitated an instant before grabbing the bottle from Phasma and throwing back another gulp for good measure. Phasma grinned and winked at him.

“Good luck.”

Kylo was irritated. Mitaka seemed intent on interrogating him about the nature of his and Hux’s relationship and nothing he could do was making him back down.

“I’m just saying, if you and Hux _are_ together then it’s cool, everyone supports you.” Mitaka’s face was flushed, half his drink already spilled down his shirt. His eyes flickered behind Kylo and he stammered out, “Oh hey Hux, we were just-”

Hux didn’t hear, only focusing on Kylo, his face inscrutable. He seemed annoyed and Hux wasn’t surprised, the mere suggestion that Kylo was even slightly interested in him was an insult. He fought back the tightness in his chest and forced a smile. “Hi.”

“Uh. Hey.” Kylo swallowed, feeling his face heat up. His world seemed to narrow to a single point, purely on Hux.

Mitaka seemed to have regained at least a little of his senses as he looked between then and slowly backed away. Tension crackled like lightning through the air and the party fell away, leaving just the two of them in their little pool of shadow.

“Imagine,” Hux chuckled, his chest constricting, “ _us_ , together.” He clenched his fist, swallowing down the lump in his throat. “I mean, you’re far better than that,” he didn’t dare meet Kylo’s eyes, “you wouldn’t want to be with someone like me.” Hux sighed, turning away only to be roughly spun, Kylo’s hand on his shoulder.

Kylo’s face burned, blood pounding through his veins. How could Hux even think that? His mouth opened, words spilling out before he could think.

“I do! I want to! In case you hadn’t noticed Hux, we _should_ be together! Or at least I think so, I just- I have no idea what you want. All I know is that I can’t stop thinking about you so do not give me that shit. _Everything_ is better when I’m with you.” Kylo’s heart pounded in his ears, blood rushing through him like a tsunami.

Stepping back, Kylo let go of Hux’s arm. Now that he’d opened his mouth he couldn’t seem to stop and to his horror he could feel his chest starting to tighten. “It’s not about the sex, part of it never was. I just… I never thought you’d want me for anything else.” Tears glinted in Kylo’s eyes, his voice coming out in a sob. “If there is even _any_ chance for us to be together for real you need to let me know. I can’t stand it any more!” 

Hux stood mute, trying to process. Kylo felt the same. Kylo thought Hux wouldn’t want him. He thought that Hux was the one rejecting him. Kylo wanted him. Kylo wanted _him_.

Kylo started towards Hux and turned away, fingers threading into his own hair in frustration. “I don’t know what to do! Tell me something, _anything_. What do you want Hux?!”

Hux swallowed, he’d been waiting too long at the edge of the precipice and now it was time to jump. Heart pounding in his chest, the countdown began around them.

“ _Ten_.”

“ _Nine_.”

“Well,” Hux began, barely audible over the crowd, “a kiss would be nice, to start.” His eyes met Kylo’s and he gave a soft smile at the look of surprise on his face.

“ _Eight_.”

“ _Seven_.”

“You’re sure?” said Kylo, voice trembling. “Because I want this to be the real thing.”

“ _Six_.” 

“ _Five_.”

“ _Four_.”

Hux placed his hand on Kylo’s arm, giving a gentle squeeze. 

“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.”

“ _Three_.”

“ _Two_.”

Kylo’s tongue slipped out to wet his lips, his heartbeat speeding up as they both stepped forwards, his arms wrapping around Hux to pull him close.

“ _One_.”


	12. January

“ _Happy New Year!_ ”

Their eyes met and Hux’s heart rose in his throat. He could feel it pounding, blood thrumming in his ears alongside the shouts of partygoers on the surrounding rooftops.

_Finally._

Hux smiled wide, leaning forward in the same breath as Kylo, their lips meeting for the first time.

It was soft. So soft. The plush teasing lips that had danced across his skin so many times now felt like something entirely new. Raising a hand Hux cupped Kylo’s cheek and felt him smile, he couldn’t help but follow. Hands tangled in his hair, gripping tight and anchoring him to the spot.

As if he’d want to be anywhere else. 

Kylo pressed closer, delirious with happiness. Hux was in his arms and he wasn’t going to let go any time soon. He opened his lips, familiarising himself with the shape of Hux’s mouth, the texture, the taste; he craved it, drinking Hux in like water. He felt his knees wobble as Hux’s tongue flicked against his own, shooting heat through his body. Dizziness threatened to overwhelm him and he reluctantly pulled back to gasp in a breath.

Hux looked dazed, mouth parted, lips pink and just starting to swell, “Kylo, I-”

“It’s okay, I know.” Kylo said, shaking his head and pulling Hux in close to wrap his arms about the slim frame he knew so well. Dipping his head to press their lips together once more he could taste the champagne on Hux’s tongue, a faint flavour that quickly disappeared, overwhelmed by a taste that was purely Hux. He could feel the cool trace of fingers on his neck before Hux pulled back, tucking his face into the crook of Kylo’s neck. 

Sparks flew as fireworks burst overhead, drawing _oohs_ and _aahhs_ from the rest of the guests. Hux couldn’t have cared less. Kylo’s arms were tight around him, his breath forming little clouds in the cold night air. Mapping Kylo’s face with his hands was both familiar and entirely new and the flutter it caused in his stomach made him never want to stop. He traced across the bridge of Kylo’s nose with his fingertips and followed them with his lips, whispering as he did so.

“No more secrets, no more pretending. I care about you Kylo. I want to be with you, only you.” He kissed across eyelids, making his way around to one ear, “I want to live with you, cook with you, wake up with you, everything.” He hooked his fingers into Kylo’s collar, “I want to calm you down when you get angry and comfort you when you’re sad.” His breath heaved, close to a sob. “You, Kylo. I want you.”

“You have me.” Kylo pressed their foreheads together, trembling, “you’ve had me for months. I just wish I’d said something sooner.”

“We both should have.” Hux pulled him in for a kiss again, slower and softer than the last, pouring everything he didn’t have the words for into Kylo’s lips. “I’m sorry, I’m an idiot.” he said when they finally pulled apart.

“Don’t be,” hands smoothed his hair down and he leaned against Kylo’s chest, “we’re both idiots, but we got there in the end.”

Kylo closed his eyes and breathed deep. The turmoil that had coursed through his body for so long was gone. His mind was calm, content. Whatever rocky course their relationship had run the way ahead was clear.

“Maybe we should head home soon,” he said, “we don’t want Millie getting lonely.”

“Do you think Phasma will mind?” Hux looked out across the rooftop. People were laughing and drinking, shaking hands and exchanging kisses, faces lit by fireworks all across the city. He slid his hand into Kylo’s and laced their fingers together, the innocent act sending shivers down his spine, “Actually, scratch that, I don’t think Phasma will even _notice_.”

“Yes she will,” said a voice behind them and they sprang apart to see Phasma with a wide smile and what looked suspiciously like tears in her eyes. “Go,” she nudged them, “go home.”

Hux smiled, snaking his arm around Kylo’s waist, still amazed by the sparks that something so simple sent through him. Phasma threw herself forwards, wrapping them both in a tight hug. “You are both fucking _idiots_!” she smiled, “But I love you. Now get out of here.”

Phasma nudged them away and glanced around. Mitaka and Unamo stood together at the bar, frantically whispering.

“I said the end of the year, now pay up!”

“I think, my dear Dopheld, you will find that it happened _after_ midnight. It’s a whole new year now. I don’t owe you a thing.” Unamo crossed her arms and smirked at Phasma, who handed her a glass of champagne.

“So,” said Mitaka, “who wants to bet on when they’ll get married?”

*****

Kylo slid his arm around Hux’s shoulders to lead him towards the elevator, fingers every so often brushing down the pale skin of his neck. He couldn’t quite believe he wasn’t dreaming, Hux was pressed to his side, holding tight. Every so often they would stop and kiss, familiarising themselves with the sensation. Kylo didn’t think he would ever get tired of it.

The journey home was a whirlwind of kisses and constant touches, neither willing to let go of the other for more than an instant. Hux couldn’t stop smiling as he unlocked the door to his apartment, Kylo’s hands on his waist.

They were greeted with a mew from Millicent who arched against their ankles, tail held high. “What?” Hux said, “I fed you before I left.” 

Kylo chuckled behind him, “I’ll feed her if you want. It might stop her from disturbing us later.”

Hux raised an eyebrow, “Disturb us from what, I wonder?” He watched as Kylo led Millicent into the kitchen and let out a little sigh of contentment. He had the distinct feeling he would be a lot less lonely from now on. 

There was just one thing he needed to ask.

As Kylo stepped back into the living room he found Hux’s arms wrapped tight about his neck and the slight coldness of his nose nuzzled against his ear. “Kylo?” Hux said, tentative. “Do you remember when we were ill?”

“Not well,” Kylo was too busy combing his fingers through Hux’s hair to recall much more than the sensation of aches and nausea. “I remember throwing up and sleeping a lot, and I remember you talking about cats.”

“Well,” Hux started, running his palm down Kylo’s arm to thread their fingers together, “I said something then, but I want to ask you properly now. Will you move in? Here. With me?”

Kylo shrank back a little, uncertainty blooming, “Isn’t this a little soon? What if things don’t work out?” He squeezed Hux’s hand tight, not wanting to think of that as a possibility.

Hux pulled back to meet Kylo’s eyes, one hand coming up to cup gently at his cheek, “Kylo,we’ve been practically dating for months, you _do_ realise I’m ridiculously in love with you, right?”

“Well now I do,” Kylo mumbled and bent to capture Hux’s lips with his own. He teased them open with his tongue, drinking in the desperate little moans. Hands moving lower, he grasped at Hux’s ass, pulling him up and feeling long legs wrap around his hips. Blindly, he walked them towards the bedroom, his arousal a rapidly rising tide as Hux’s hands tugged at his hair.

Finally his shins hit the mattress and Kylo lowered Hux onto it, crawling to cover his body completely. He pressed himself closer, not wanting a single inch of space between them. His hands slid up Hux’s sides and beneath his shirt and Kylo could feel his heart speeding. Pulling back he met Hux’s eyes, “Is it weird that I’m a little nervous?”

Hux shook his head and rolled so they were side by side, foreheads pressed together, “I am too, maybe we should just take it slow?”

“Yeah, slow.” Kylo slotted their hips together with a gentle rock. “Love you.” he whispered and heard Hux’s soft gasp before pulling him into another kiss.

Kylo’s fingers splayed across Hux’s shoulders, stroking in gentle circles as Hux’s own palms pressed against the broad expanse of Kylo’s chest. Their lips slid together in a slow, wet caress that had Hux’s heart racing. His fingers fumbled with the buttons on Kylo’s shirt, determined to feel the touch of skin against skin.

Kylo followed suit, pushing Hux’s shirt from his shoulders to trace his collarbones with broad thumbs. He rocked into Hux again, feeling the answering hardness against his thigh. Hux’s lips were pulled from his own and trailed down his neck in fluttering kisses that made him squirm.

Hux smiled to himself as Kylo’s hand found his ass, palming it and squeezing tightly. He caressed Kylo’s chest, rubbing his thumb over one pink nipple before lowering his mouth to run his tongue around the hard nub, sucking it into his mouth. Kylo hissed in a breath and pushed his hardening cock against Hux’s own. 

“Ah!” 

Hux moaned at the contact and pulled back to wind his fingers through Kylo’s hair, giving it a gentle tug to bring their lips back into contact. Their chests were pressed flush together, a slight sheen of sweat just starting to rise. He rocked into Kylo’s cock and whined, there was just too much fabric in the way. He needed to touch Kylo properly and he needed it now. Reluctantly breaking the kiss he reached to undo his trousers.

“Let me just- mmm!” Hux’s back bowed in a delicate arch as Kylo grabbed both trousers and underwear, stripping his lower half completely bare. One hand palmed his cock and Hux felt himself twitch at the contact. “Oh yeah, that’s good. Need to touch you too.” Kylo grinned and wriggled out of his own clothes just as fast. He turned for a second to scramble in the bedside drawer before bringing out the bottle of lube.

“You know, we’ll need to get more soon. Especially if I’m gonna live here.” Kylo poured the slick into his palm before reaching to stroke at himself, smirking at the expression on Hux’s face.

“We can get whatever you want, love.” Hux’s breath was starting to speed as he watched Kylo pump himself, a pink tongue flicking out to wet kiss-swollen lips.

“Love?” Kylo raised an eyebrow, “I could get used to that.” 

Hux slicked his own hand and looped an arm about Kylo’s neck to pull him close. He hissed as Kylo’s hand grasped him, stroking downwards in a firm grip and reached to wrap his own hand around the thick heat of Kylo’s cock. Kylo grunted and thrust against him, his hips matching the speed of his hand and Hux followed, letting him set the pace.

His moans were swallowed my Kylo’s mouth, hot and wet and relentless against his own, his tongue tangling with Hux’s even as their chests heaved together for breath. Heat pooled low in his spine and Hux rocked faster, feeling the slick slide of Kylo’s hand around him.

Stopping, Kylo gently took Hux’s wrist and pulled his hand from his cock. He panted, sliding his cock alongside Hux’s and pressing their hips together in a series of hard thrusts. Hux withdrew from his lips and swore, matching Kylo’s movements, feeling himself edging closer. Fingers gripping tight on Kylo’s shoulder, he moaned, eyes fluttering closed.

Their cocks slid together between them, slick and warm and hard. Kylo could feel the pressure building and held tight to Hux’s ass, matching every thrust. Hux’s arms wrapped around him, fingers digging into his back, breath hot on his neck with every gasp.

“Kylo! Ngh! Kylo-”

“Hux! Oh god!” Kylo crushed their lips together, moaning around Hux’s tongue as he spilled between them, hips stuttering. Hux jerked against him in a few more thrusts, hand anchored tight in Kylo’s hair, the hot splash of his come pooling on Kylo’s belly.

Together they sighed, breath shuddering and chests heaving. Their lips met in a kiss, soft and soothing and Kylo buried his head in Hux’s neck to breathe in the scent. Hux pulled him close, lips brushing across sweaty hair.

Hux let out a hum, feeling Kylo’s heartbeat against his palm. His limbs were deliciously heavy, the tension that had flowed through them for the last few months all but gone.

“We should get cleaned up I suppose.” Kylo pulled Hux close, ignoring the stickiness between them. “I’m gonna get a towel.” He pressed a kiss to Hux’s forehead and hurried to the bathroom, not wanting to be away from Hux for too long.

When he returned Hux sighed in sleepy contentment, letting Kylo mop him up. “Thanks Kylo love.” He pulled the covers up as Kylo slid in next to him, nestling into his arms. Dark waves tickled on his chest and Hux felt the rumble of Kylo’s voice vibrate through him.

“Oh yeah, I can definitely get used to you calling me that.” His eyes sparkled in the dark as he rose up one one elbow, “But what should I call you?”

Hux smiled, twisting a strand of Kylo’s hair around his finger before stroking down one cheek. He lifted his head for a kiss and curled into the warm embrace of Kylo’s arms.

“Armie?”

“No.”

“Mitty?”

“No.”

“Tidge?”

“Definitely not.”

“What about Pumpkin? Should I call you that?”

“Go to sleep Kylo.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Illustration for this chapter [here](http://moonwalkingcrab.tumblr.com/image/159054161454). Drawn by the absolutely phenomenal 


	13. February: Redux

Cold droplets trickled their way down Hux’s neck as he climbed the stairs to their apartment. The grey February rain had been threatening to spill all day and evidently his leaving work had been the final catalyst. Breathing deep Hux unlocked the door to their apartment. He had managed to avoid working late, it was Valentine’s day and a small part of him was already anticipating whatever Kylo had planned for the date.

Shaking the raindrops from his hair Hux slipped from his jacket and into the warm embrace of home. The light was dim as he slid off his shoes and circled his shoulders, spine crackling. Hux stretched out, smiling at the soft pad of feet running towards him. Millicent mewed once in hello and arched at his ankles. Hux’s skin prickled with goosebumps and he picked Millie up, cuddling into her, warming himself. There really wasn’t much for him to do, Kylo had insisted on taking care of all plans for the night. He wandered towards the living room feeling the carpet beneath his feet, sliding between his toes like blades of grass. The air was filled with steam and the smell of cooking and Hux smiled, hearing footsteps behind him.

“Welcome home.” Hux was wrapped in strong arms and a pair of plush lips found his neck, nibbling and sucking. Breath was hot in his ear and Kylo’s warm voice whispered, “I missed you.”

“Well you’re the one who insisted on staying home today,” Hux pulled Kylo’s arms tighter around him. “I hope it was worth it.”

Turning, Hux found himself eye to eye with Kylo who smirked and leaned in. His lips were impossibly soft as they pressed against Hux’s own, catching and sliding and then pressing in once more. One hand caressed Hux’s neck, gently tilting his head back to let his mouth fall open. Kylo’s tongue traced the outline of his lips before slipping in to tangle with Hux’s in a sliding dance of hot breath and sweet taste. Hux groaned, his hands rising to fist in thick hair, gripping tight as he was lifted into Kylo’s arms.

His legs wrapped around the hard press of Kylo’s body as he led them to the couch before collapsing on top of Hux, their mouths never parting for an instant. Kylo stripped his t-shirt off in a single movement, eyes glinting as he looked down at Hux sprawled on the couch.

“Kylo-” Hux started before Kylo’s mouth was on his once more, dipping and tasting, their bodies grinding together almost painfully. Kylo pulled back, his lips pink and starting to swell.

“Yes Pumpkin?”

“Well as nice as this is, I _really_ need to shower.” Hux pulled himself up, fingers tracing circles on Kylo’s chest. “Maybe you could join me?”

“Mmm, sounds good. I just need to check on dinner first. You go, I’ll catch up.”

Hux stepped into the warmth of the shower with a contented sigh, he could already feel himself relaxing. He was certain he’d have to put up with Kylo bragging about his cooking skills for the next few days and smiled. Hux had mentioned so many times that he was going to teach Kylo how to cook and it seemed like the lessons were paying off.

Running his soapy hands down his body Hux felt a shiver run through him. He wondered idly what exactly Kylo had planned for the evening. Every night since they started living together had been something new, and while they still bickered occasionally, it was nice to be able to end arguments with a kiss. It had taken some adjustments after so long living by himself but Hux felt things were going exceptionally well.

He’d forgotten what it was like showering alone for a start.

Humming, Hux pretended not to hear the door open before arching into the sensation of broad hands circling down his hips and a hard body pressed against his own. Hux turned, fingers stroking down the length of Kylo’s torso, feeling him slowly starting to harden against his thigh. He closed his hand about Kylo’s cock in a loose grip, slowly stroking the length in lazy, wet slides. 

Kylo’s teeth found his bottom lip as Hux’s fingers trailed up to circle one nipple. His breath hissed out, only adding to the warmth in the enclosed shower as plush lips descended on his neck, licking down the length of his throat, following the trail of the water. 

He slid his hand downwards, rolling Hux’s balls, groping at them the way he knew Hux liked. Hux’s hands found his ass and Kylo dipped his head downwards to catch his lips in a kiss made all the wetter by the water running down their faces. He wrapped his free arm around Hux, squeezing at his shoulder when he felt slim fingers delve between his cheeks to rub enticingly across his hole. They pressed gently, circling the rim with feather light touches and Kylo groaned, “You are such a tease, you know that?”

Hux simply smiled, “I know.”

“Yeah well two can play at that game. Dinner’s almost ready so we’ll just have to continue this later.” Kylo smirked, giving Hux’s cock a last squeeze and climbing out. “I can give you five minutes if you wanna finish yourself off.”

“Five min- you just- I don’t- You know very well that I last longer than that!” Hux’s face was starting to turn pink, “Besides, if I finish now then where would that leave you?”

“Aww, you’re saying you don’t want all _this_ ” Kylo twirled in his unfastened bathrobe, sliding a hand down his still half-hard cock and wiggling his ass in Hux’s direction.

Hux shook his head, smiling fondly, “You’re an idiot.”

“Yeah well, that’s why you love me,” Kylo winked and started towelling his hair, “besides, you’re an idiot too. I asked you to get toilet paper on the way home and you forgot. Again.”

“Says the man who was off all day today!” Hux’s voice echoed in the small space of the bathroom, “You must have been shopping for whatever you’re making for dinner so why didn’t you get any?”

“Oh shit,” Kylo said, “I didn’t even think.”

Shaking his head, Hux stepped out of the shower. “I’ll get some tomorrow.” He accepted the towel Kylo held out and wrapped it around his waist. He pressed his nose into the gap of Kylo’s robe, nuzzling against his chest, “Dinner does smell lovely though, thank you for doing all this.”

Kylo pressed a kiss to the top of Hux’s head, “I guess you’re worth it. I really need to go check it though.”

Hux nodded, “I’ll just go get dressed.”

“You don’t have to,” Kylo wiggled his eyebrows, “I quite like the way you are now.”

Smiling, Hux picked up his discarded work clothes and made his way to the bedroom. He pulled an envelope from his jacket pocket and smoothed it out. It seemed that Kylo was content eating dinner in a bathrobe so Hux followed suit. Kylo had bought him a pink one not long after moving in, having claimed Hux’s old green one as his own. He slipped the envelope into a pocket and wandered out of the bedroom.

The dining table had been set and candles flickered in the low light as Kylo whistled to himself in the kitchen. Hux blinked, still not quite believing things had worked out this way. Every day he expected to wake up and find that none of this was real. More often than not though, he woke up with Kylo’s hair in his face.

“Need a hand?” Hux asked, watching as Kylo dished out their food. It smelled delicious and extremely familiar. “What are you making?”

Kylo grabbed a plate in each hand and gestured for Hux to sit at the table. “I made lamb stew.” His cheeks were slightly pink as he sat down opposite, “Do you remember? You made it for us the first time we-”

Hux’s eyes widened, “Oh!” he reached over to take Kylo’s hand, “I didn’t realise you were quite so romantic.”

“Yup. And then you came on my face,” Kylo smiled, dipping his finger in sauce and sucking it into his mouth. Across from him Hux spluttered, letting go of his hand and turning to his food, cheeks glowing. After a few mouthfuls Hux ran his fingers through his damp hair, composing himself.

“You know after that I don’t think you deserve these.” Hux pulled an envelope from the pocket of his robe and slid it across the table. Kylo frowned as he picked it up, watching Hux’s face for any sort of clue.

Hux simply sipped his wine, waiting, expression giving nothing away. He smiled softly as Kylo ripped open the envelope, eyes suddenly widening.

“Paris? We’re going to Paris?” Kylo’s mouth fell open and Hux reached over to join their hands once more.

“You’re not the only one who can be romantic you know.” He rubbed his fingers across the back of Kylo’s hand, “And I wanted to take my boyfriend somewhere nice.”

Kylo’s lips quirked in a smile, “Boyfriend? I don’t think I’ve heard you call me that before.”

“Oh? Would you rather I call you something else?” Hux’s eyes glinted in the candlelight and Kylo found his breath speeding up.

“Well, I _do_ like it when you say my name, but I think that can wait until after dessert.” Kylo licked his lips, watching as Hux mimicked the motion, “I made chocolate covered strawberries.”

Hux paused and opened his mouth to speak before stopping and shaking his head, “Why exactly did you make those?”

“Well, y’know it’s all sexy and seductive and you feed them to each other and drink wine in the candlelight and oh god I can’t eat them can I?”

Hux snorted with laughter at Kylo’s sudden expression of woe. “You’re telling me you got so wrapped up in this that you forgot your own allergies?” He couldn’t help but smile. Of course that’s what happened, it was Kylo.

Kylo pouted, “Well, I wanted it to be romantic.”

“It is, love, it really is.” Hux rose to step over and settle himself in Kylo’s lap. Stroking a finger down Kylo’s neck he smiled, pressing a kiss to his forehead, “I’ll just eat the strawberries some other time.”

Kylo smirked, tilting his head, “You could always have them tonight and just _not_ kiss me.” His eyes widened when Hux’s hand fisted in the collar of his shirt, dragging him forwards to crush their lips together.

“ _Never_ again.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Moodboard for this fic [here](http://moonwalkingcrab.tumblr.com/image/157246996362).

**Author's Note:**

> Come say Hi on [tumblr](http://moonwalkingcrab.tumblr.com/).


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